Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Toy Story Toons: Small Fry script

(Walt Disney Pictures logo: The short version of the CGI castle)
(Pixar Animation Studios logo: The short version which starts with the completed logo and only includes Luxo Jr. looking up)
(TITLE CARD: TOY STORY TOONS)
(INT. POULTRY PALACE – DAY. BONNIE and her mom are in the fast food restaurant. TITLE CARD on the meal says, SMALL FRY)
CASHIER: Small fry, and here's your toy.
(She places the belt buckle next to the meal)
Bonnie: A Zurg belt buckle? Can I get a Buzz Lightyear instead?
Cashier: We're all out of Buzzes.
Bonnie's Mom: Well, can she have that one?
(The cashier turned to the display where MINI BUZZ and MINI ZURG were standing)
Cashier: I'm sorry, those are for display only.
BONNIE'S MOM: Thanks anyways. Come on, Bonnie.
(Mini Buzz turns to Mini Zurg)
Mini Buzz: See? I told you we're never gonna get played with.
Mini Zurg: But we're just here to sell chicken.
BONNIE: All right! Ball pit!
Mini Buzz: Hey, hey, wait a minute.
(She saw Bonnie entering the play structure through the ball pit with Rex–and Buzz Lightyear!)
Bonnie: Splash!
Mini Buzz: I think I just found our ticket to playtime. Come on, let's go!
Mini Zurg: I better not. I don't want to get in trouble with the chicken people.
Baby Piggy: Fine. You stay here with the Belt Buckle. Me, I'm gonna get played with! See ya, Zurgy!
(He left the display)
Mini Zurg: Oh, boy.
Belt Buckle: (BUZZES)
(INT. PLAY STRUCTURE, POULTRY PALACE – DAY.)
Bonnie: Oh, no! Hot lava!
(Bonnie drops Buzz and Rex down a slide. They landed into a ball pit. Bonnie is right behind them)
Bonnie: Splash!
BONNIE'S MOM: Come on, Bonnie!
Bonnie: Coming!
(She left the ball pit, leaving Buzz and Rex behind)
Rex: I loved playtime!
Buzz: It's a little unsanitary but... Ho!
(Abruptly, he is pulled down under the ball pit and Mini Buzz rises)
Mini Buzz: Playtime's the best!
BONNIE'S MOM: Bonnie, don't forget your toys.
(Bonnie's mom grabbed Rex and Mini Buzz out of the ball pit)
(EXT. POULTRY PALACE – DAY. They exit the building)
(INT. BONNIE'S BEDROOM – DAY. Bonnie enters and puts her backpack away)
Bonnie: Hi, toys. Bye, toys.
(Rex popped out from the backpack)
Rex: Hi, everybody! We're home!
Woody: Hey, welcome back! How was Poultry... Ugh! What smells like chicken fingers?
(Mini Buzz climbs out of the backpack and into Rex's head)
Mini Buzz: I'm Buzz Lightyear. I come in peace.
(The Toys knew that Buzz is missing)
Jessie: Uh... What happened to Buzz?
Rex: He says the plastic in the ball pit made him shrink!
Mini Buzz: Yeah, yeah, that's right, Tex. Say, when's the playtime start around here?
Woody: All right, where's the real Buzz?
(INT. POULTRY PALACE – NIGHT. Buzz rose up from the ball pit, gets out, and tries to open the door put it's locked)
Buzz: Blast.
(He uses the air vent. He climbs up the air vent. He walks through until he falls out... )
(INT. STORAGE, POULTRY PALACE – NIGHT. ...and landed into the crowd of happy meal toys)
Neptuna: Well, hello!
Buzz: (GASPS)
Neptuna: Welcome to the support group for discarded Fun Meal Toys. We're just about to begin. T-Bone?
(T-BONE appeared)
Neptuna: Would you find him a seat.
T-Bone: Right this way, sir.
(He sits down and speaks up)
Buzz: I think there's been a mistake. You see, I was just left in the ball pit and I...
Neptuna: Oh, we've all been left in the ball pit of life, haven't we? Yes, Tae-Kwon Doe? You have a question?
Tae-Kwon Doe: What? Oh, I'm sorry, this is just my play feature. Hi-yah!
Neptuna: That's super. Now why don't we just go around the room and introduce ourselves? My name is Neptuna.
TOYS: Hi, Neptuna.
Neptuna: I was from the Mermaid Battle Squadron tie-in. Summer '98. I was thrown away, and that's okay.
T-Bone: I'm T-Bone, leader of the Steak Force. We battled the Vegi-Tanarians for dinner table dominance. Well, I never got played with.
Koala Kopter: G'day. The name's Koala Kopter from the Down-Underables. I got swapped for a Kangaroo Kanoe!
Recycle Ben: My name is Recycle Ben and I got recycled!
Franklin: (STAMMERS) I don't get it. Why don't the kids like me? I'm like history, but on wheels!
Vlad the Engineer: Nobody wanted to board the Vampire Express.
(The howling wolf on top of the train appears)
Roxy Boxy: My name is Roxy Boxy. I was recalled because... (accidentally hits Lizard Wizard with her boxing glove) Sorry!
Nervous Sys-Tim: I mean, who wants to see an accurate depiction of the human nervous system when they're chowing down on a burger.
Pizza Bot: Kid not like Pizza Bot. Pizza Pot sad.
Buzz: My name is Buzz.
Toys (All): Hi, Buzz.
Buzz: And I need to go.
T-Bone: Wait, don't run away from your problems, brother.
Buzz: Look, I need to get back to my friends.
Neptuna: We're your friends now, Buzz? Look around you. We've all been discarded and we need to stick together. Isn't that right, Super Pirate?
Super Pirate: Yar.
(INT. BONNIE'S BEDROOM – NIGHT. Mini Buzz is feet skating)
Mini Buzz: Playtime's coming super-soon
Doo-dah, doo-dah
Rex: Guys, I'm telling you, this is the real Buzz!
Mini Buzz: Doo-Doo-didley-doo-doo-doo
Oh, playtime day
Woody: Rex, he's like three inches tall.
Hamm: Yeah, but he's a pretty good ice dancer.
(Mini Buzz spin jumps)
TOYS: Whoa!
Woody: Well, I'm gonna go find out what happened to our friend.
(Mini Buzz keeps skating)
Woody: Yoo-hoo! Little Buzz guy!
Mini Buzz: Oh, playtime day
Woody: Listen, about this playtime...
Mini Buzz: Playtime? Hey, I'll be the cowboy!
(He grabs Woody's hat from him him)
Woody: Hey! Come back here!
(Mini Buzz comes to Hamm)
Mini Buzz: Get along, little piggy! Hee-haw!
(He slaps him and skates)
Hamm: Could somebody tackle him, please?
Mini Buzz: Playtime is your friend
(Abruptly, Woody tackles him)
Hamm: Thank you.
(INT. STORAGE, POULTRY PALACE – NIGHT. The Fun Meal toy support group finish the affirmation)
TOYS: Even though I have been thrown away, I am not garbage.
(They applauded. Poor Buzz. He doesn't know what to do)
Buzz: (SIGHS) How am I gonna get up there?
Neptuna: All right, everyone, this is a good time for some reenactment therapy. Let's break into groups of two. And let's have Beef Stewardes with Ghost Burger.
Ghost Burger: Oooo!
Neptuna: Bozu the Ninja Clown with Funky Monk.
Funky Monk: Wassup.
Neptuna: And then Conderman
Conderman: All right!
Neptuna: With DJ Blu-Jay. Lizard Wizard? I'm gonna put you with Buzz.
(Lizard Wizard rolls up to Buzz)
Neptuna (CONT.): Now Buzz, you are a child who has received this toy. Pick him up and play with him.
(Buzz picks up Lizard Wizard)
Buzz: Oh, boy. Play, play, play.
Lizard Wizard: Oh. (LAUGHS)
Neptuna: Good. Now, to simulate the abandonment, discard him.
Lizard Wizard: What?
(Buzz lets go of Lizard Wizard, dropping him)
Neptuna: And walk over there next to Gary Grappling Hook.
Buzz: Gary Grappling Hook?
Gary Grappling Hook: Hey there.
Buzz: So, wouldn't it be more devastating if I left the room?
Neptuna: Oh, what a fabulous idea! Thank you, Buzz.
Buzz: Gary, do you mind?
Gary Grappling Hook: Yeah, sure, whatever.
(Buzz grabs Gary Grappling Hook)
Gary Grappling Hook: Whoa! Oh, yeah!
(Buzz pushes Gary Grappling Hook's trigger and his grappling hook flew up and caught the air vent)
Gary Grappling Hook: That was awesome.
(Buzz hoists himself up into the ceiling where he will have his chance to escape Poultry Palace)
Neptuna: Now, how did that make you feel?
Lizard Wizard: Well, let's see now. It made me happy when I was played with, but sad when he left.
Neptuna: Good. Okay, good, hold that thought. We're going to have Buzz come back in now. Buzz?
(Neptuna and Lizard Wizard turned and saw Gary Grappling Hook)
Gary Grappling Hook: Uh, he left.
(Abruptly, Lizard Wizard burst into tears)
Lizard Wizard: (SOBBING) No!
(INT. BONNIE'S BEDROOM – DAY. Woody hatched a rescue mission to the Toys)
Woody: Okay. To save Buzz, we need to find a way to get inside Poultry Palace.
(Mini Buzz is all tied up. Jessie is next to him)
Baby Piggy: So, I used to work at Poultry Palace. You like honey mustard sauce? Yeah, you do.
Woody: Come on, guys, think. How do we get inside?
Hamm: We could jimmy the lock.
Mr. Pricklepants: Let's act our way in!
Mrs. Potato Head: Oh! We could drive a truck through the front door!
(Until…)
Buzz: Or, you could use the drive-through.
(The Toys turned saw the real Buzz)
Toys (All): Buzz!
(Jessie hugs Buzz)
Jessie: You're back!
(Then the real Buzz turns to the Mini Buzz)
Buzz: So, what do you have to say for yourself, Space Ranger?
Mini Buzz: (GULPS)
(INT. STORAGE, POULTRY PALACE – DAWN. Buzz and Mini Buzz hold the support group)
Mini Buzz: I've done some things that I'm not proud of. I've spent a lot of playtime thinking I was the prize that came with the meal, but with the help of my sponsor, I know now that the real prize is inside of each and every one of us.
(The Fun Meal toys applauded. The boxing glove is accidentally shot by Roxy Boxy and hits Lizard Wizard)
Roxy Boxy: Oh! Sorry.
(THE END)

CAST
Tom Hanks – Woody
Tim Allen – Buzz Lightyear
John Ratzenberger – Hamm
Wallace Shawn – Rex
Joan Cusack – Jessie
Estelle Harris – Mrs. Potato Head
Don Rickles – Mr. Potato Head
Jane Lynch – Neptuna
Teddy Newton – Mini Buzz
Emily Hahn – Bonnie
Angus MacLane – Gary Grappling Hook / T-Bone / Funky Munk / Super Pirate
Lori Alan – Bonnie's mom / Tae-Kwon Doe
Josh Cooley – Cashier / Lizard Wizard
Jess Harnell – Mini Zurg / Vlad the Engineer
Bret Parker – DJ Blu-Jay
Emily Forbes – Roxy Boxy
Kitt Hirasaki – Nervous Sys-Tim
Peter Sohn – Recycle Ben
Carlos Alazraqui – Koala Kopter
Bob Bergen – Condorman
Timothy Dalton – Mr. Pricklepants
Jason Topolski – Ghost Burger / Pizza Bot
Jim Ward – Franklin
ADDITIONAL VOICES: Lori Alan, Bob Bergen, John Cygan, Jess Harnell, Danny Mann, Cristina Pucelli, Jan Rabson, Jim Ward

(POST-CREDITS SCENE)
(INT. POULTRY PALACE – NIGHT. Mini Zurg and Belt Buckle are left behind in the display)
Belt Buckle: (BEEPING)
MINI ZURG: (LAUGHS) Oh, that was a good one. Belt Buckle, you crack me up sometimes.

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