Disney NeverEnding Chronology (Thanksgiving 2016–Winter 2016/2017) - Subtitles (en)

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GRAMMA: In the beginning...

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there was only ocean...

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until the mother island emerged.

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Te Fiti.

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Her heart held the greatest power

ever known.

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It could create life itself.

_________________________________

And Te Fiti shared it with the world.

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But in time...

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some began to seek Te Fiti's heart.

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They believed

if they could possess it...

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the great power of creation

would be theirs.

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And one day...

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the most daring of them all...

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voyaged across the vast ocean

to take it.

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He was a demigod of the wind and sea.

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He was a warrior.

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A trickster.

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A shapeshifter who

could change form...

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with the power of his magical fish hook.

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And his name...

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was Maui.

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(CHUCKLES)

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(RUMBLING)

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But without her heart,

Te Fiti began to crumble...

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giving birth to a terrible darkness.

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Maui tried to escape...

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but was confronted by another

who sought the heart.

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Te Kā!

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A demon of earth and fire.

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Maui was struck from the sky...

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never to be seen again.

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And his magical fish hook

and the heart of Te Fiti...

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were lost to the sea.

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Where, even now...

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1,000 years later...

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Te Kā and the demons of the deep...

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still hunt for the heart.

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Hiding in a darkness

that will continue to spread...

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chasing away our fish...

_________________________________

draining the life

from island after island...

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until every one of us is devoured...

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by the bloodthirsty jaws...

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of inescapable death!

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(WAILING)

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But one day...

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the heart will be found...

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by someone who will journey

beyond our reef...

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find Maui...

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deliver him across the great ocean...

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to restore Te Fiti's heart...

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and save us all.

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Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Thank you, Mother. That's enough.

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Papa.

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No one goes outside the reef.

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We are safe here. There is no darkness.

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There are no monsters.

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Monsters!

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-There's no monsters, no monsters...

-It's the darkness!

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No, there is nothing beyond our reef,

but storms and rough seas.

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I'm gonna throw up.

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TUI: As long as we stay

on our very safe island...

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we'll be fine.

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GRAMMA: The legends are true.

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Someone will have to go.

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TUI: Mother, Motunui is paradise.

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Who would want to go anywhere else?

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(BIRDS SCREECHING)

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Shoo, shoo!

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(EXCLAIMING)

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(ETHEREAL WHISPERING)

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(GIGGLING)

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(GIGGLING)

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TUI: Moana!

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There you are, Moana.

What are you doing? You scared me.

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What? I wanna's go back.

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I know, I know.

But you don't go out there.

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It's dangerous.

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Moana, come on.

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Let's go back to the village.

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You are the next great chief

of our people.

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And you will do wondrous things,

my little minnow.

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Oh, yes. But first, you must learn

where you're meant to be.

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Moana

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Make way, make way

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Moana, it's time you knew

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The village of Motunui is all you need

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The dancers are practicing

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They dance to an ancient song

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Who needs a new song

This old one's all we need

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This tradition is our mission

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And Moana, there's so much to do

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Don't trip on the taro root

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That's all you need

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We share everything we make

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We joke and we weave our baskets

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The fishermen come back from the sea

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I wanna see

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Don't walk away

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Moana, stay on the ground now

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Our people will need a chief

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-And there you are

-There you are

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There comes a day

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When you're gonna look around

And realize happiness is

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Where you are

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Consider the coconut

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-The what

-Consider its tree

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We use each part of the coconut

It's all we need

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We make our nets from the fibers

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The water is sweet inside

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We use the leaves to build fires

We cook up the meat inside

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Consider the coconuts

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The trunks and the leaves

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The island gives us what we need

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And no one leaves

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That's right, we stay

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We're safe and we're well-provided

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And when we look to the future

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There you are

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You'll be okay

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In time you'll learn just as I did

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You must find happiness

right where you are

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I like to dance with the water

The undertow and the waves

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The water is mischievous

Ha! I like how it misbehaves

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The village may think I'm crazy

Or say that I drift too far

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But once you know what you like

Well, there you are

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You are your father's daughter

Stubbornness and pride

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Mind what he says but remember

You may hear a voice inside

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And if the voice starts to whisper

To follow the farthest star

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Moana, that voice inside

is who you are

_________________________________

-Uh-huh.

-Dad!

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I was only looking at the boats.

I wasn't gonna get on 'em.

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(SIGHS)

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Come on.

There's something I need to show you.

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I've wanted to bring you here from

the moment you opened your eyes.

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This is a sacred place.

_________________________________

A place of chiefs.

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There will come a time...

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when you will stand on this peak

and place a stone on this mountain.

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Like I did. Like my father did.

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And his father, and every chief

that has ever been.

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And on that day...

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when you add your stone...

_________________________________

you will raise this whole island higher.

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You are the future of our people, Moana.

_________________________________

And they are not out there.

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They are right here.

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It's time to be who they need you to be.

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-We make our nets from the fibers

-We weave our nets from the fibers

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-The water is sweet inside

-A real tasty treat inside

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-We use the leaves to build fires

-We sing these songs in our choirs

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-To cook up the meat inside

-We have mouths to feed inside

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-The village believes in us

-That's right

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The village believes

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The island gives us what we need

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And no one leaves

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So here I'll stay

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My home, my people beside me

And when I think of tomorrow

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There we are

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I'll lead the way

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I'll have my people to guide me

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We'll build our future together

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Where we are

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'Cause every path leads ya back to

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Where you are

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You can find happiness right

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Where you are

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Where you are

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And every storm, this roof leaks,

no matter how many fronds I add.

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MOANA: Fixed!

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Not the fronds.

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-Wind shifted the post.

-Ah!

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-Mmm! That's good pork!

-(PUA GRUNTING)

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Oh! I didn't mean... I wasn't...

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(CLEARS THROAT) What?

They're calling me, so I gotta... Bye!

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VILLAGER: Ow! Ow! Ow!

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You're doing great.

_________________________________

Is it done yet?

_________________________________

(CONTINUES SCREAMING)

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So close.

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(DRUM BEATS PLAYING)

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I'm curious about that chicken

eating the rock.

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He seems to lack the basic intelligence

required for pretty much everything.

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Should we maybe just cook him?

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Sometimes our strengths lie

beneath the surface.

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Far beneath in some cases.

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But I'm sure there's more to Heihei

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-than meets the eye.

-(HEIHEI CAWING)

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It's the harvest.

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This morning,

I was husking the coconuts and...

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Well...

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we should clear the diseased trees

and we will start a new grove.

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There.

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Thanks, Moana.

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She's doing great.

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This suits you.

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FISHERMAN: Chief?

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(PANTING)

There's something you need to see.

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Our traps in the east lagoon...

_________________________________

they're pulling up less and less fish.

_________________________________

Then we'll rotate the fishing grounds.

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Uh, we have. There's no fish.

_________________________________

Oh. Then we'll fish

the far side of the island.

_________________________________

We tried.

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The windward side.

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And the leeward side, the shallows,

the channel.

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We've tried the whole lagoon.

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They're just gone.

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TUI:

Have you tried using a different bait?

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FISHERMAN: I don't think it's the bait.

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There's no fish.

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It seems like

it's getting worse and worse.

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TUI: Of course, I understand

you have reason for concern.

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I will talk to the council.

I'm sure we...

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What if we fish beyond the reef?

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No one goes beyond the reef.

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I know. But if there are no fish

in the lagoon...

_________________________________

-Moana.

-And there's a whole ocean.

_________________________________

We have one rule.

_________________________________

An old rule, when there were fish.

_________________________________

-A rule that keeps us safe...

-But Dad, I...

_________________________________

instead of endangering our people

so you can run right back to the water.

_________________________________

(EXHALES)

_________________________________

(HUFFING)

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Every time I think you're past this...

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No one goes beyond the reef!

_________________________________

Well, it's not like you said it

in front of your dad.

_________________________________

Standing on a boat.

_________________________________

I didn't say go beyond the reef,

because I want to be on the ocean.

_________________________________

But you still do.

_________________________________

(MOANA SIGHS)

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-He's hard on you because...

-Because he doesn't get me.

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Because he was you.

_________________________________

Drawn to the ocean.

_________________________________

Down by the shore.

_________________________________

He took a canoe, Moana.

_________________________________

He crossed the reef...

_________________________________

and found an unforgiving sea.

_________________________________

Waves like mountains.

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His best friend begged

to be on that boat.

_________________________________

Your dad couldn't save him.

_________________________________

He's hoping he can save you.

_________________________________

Sometimes...

_________________________________

who we wish we were,

what we wish we could do...

_________________________________

it's just not meant to be.

_________________________________

I've been staring

at the edge of the water

_________________________________

Long as I can remember

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Never really knowing why

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I wish I could be the perfect daughter

_________________________________

But I come back to the water

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 No matter how hard I try

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Every turn I take

Every trail I track

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Every path I make

Every road leads back

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To the place I know

Where I cannot go

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Where I long to be

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See the line where the

sky meets the sea

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It calls me

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And no one knows

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How far it goes

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If the wind in my sail on the sea

Stays behind me

_________________________________

One day I'll know

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If I go, there's just no telling

how far I'll go

_________________________________

I know everybody on this island

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Seems so happy on this island

_________________________________
Everything is by design

_________________________________

(SQUEALS)

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I know everybody on this island

_________________________________

Has a role on this island

_________________________________

So maybe I can roll with mine

_________________________________

I can lead with pride

I can make us strong

_________________________________

I'll be satisfied

If I play along

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But the voice inside

Sings a different song

_________________________________

What is wrong with me

_________________________________

See the light as it shines on the sea

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It's blinding

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But no one knows

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How deep it goes

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And it seems like it's calling out to me

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So come find me

_________________________________

And let me know

_________________________________

What's beyond that line

Will I cross that line

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The line where the sky meets the sea

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It calls me

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And no one knows

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How far it goes

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If the wind in my sail on the sea

stays behind me

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One day I'll know

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How far I'll go

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Whoa.

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We're okay, Pua.

_________________________________

I can do this.

_________________________________

(EXHALES)

_________________________________

There's more fish beyond the reef.

_________________________________

There's more beyond the reef.

_________________________________

(PUA SQUEALING)

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Not so bad.

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(GASPS)

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-(PUA SQUEALING FRANTICALLY)

-Pua!

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(COUGHING)

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(GASPING)

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(PUA SQUEALING)

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(WINCES)

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Whatever just happened...

_________________________________

blame it on the pig.

_________________________________

Gramma.

_________________________________

Are you gonna tell Dad?

_________________________________

I'm his mom.

I don't have to tell him anything.

_________________________________

He was right.

_________________________________

About going out there.

_________________________________

It's time to put my stone

on the mountain.

_________________________________

Okay. Well, then, head on back.

_________________________________

Put that stone up there.

_________________________________

Why aren't you trying

to talk me out of it?

_________________________________

You said that's what you wanted.

_________________________________

It is.

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(GRAMMA HUMMING)

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GRAMMA: When I die...

_________________________________

I'm going to come back as one of these.

_________________________________

Or I chose the wrong tattoo.

_________________________________

Why are you acting weird?

_________________________________

I'm the village crazy lady.

That's my job.

_________________________________

If there's something you want to tell me,

just tell me!

_________________________________

Is there something you wanna tell me?

_________________________________

Is there something you want to hear?

_________________________________

You've been told

all our people's stories...

_________________________________

but one.

_________________________________

What is this place?

_________________________________

Do you really think

our ancestors stayed within the reef?

_________________________________

(GASPS)

_________________________________

Ooh!

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MOANA: What's in there?

_________________________________

The answer to the question

you keep asking yourself.

_________________________________

Who are you meant to be?

_________________________________

Go inside...

_________________________________

bang the drum...

_________________________________

and find out.

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(GASPS)

_________________________________

Whoa.

_________________________________

Oh.

_________________________________

Bang the drum.

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(DRUM BEAT ECHOING)

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(GASPS)

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(YELPS)

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(ETHEREAL VOICES ECHOING)

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(SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)

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We read the wind and the sky

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When the sun is high

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We sail the length of the seas

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On the ocean breeze

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At night we name every star

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We know where we are

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We know who we are

Who we are

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We set a course to find

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A brand new island

everywhere we roam

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We keep our island in our mind

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And when it's time to find home

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We know the way

_________________________________

We are explorers reading every sign

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We tell the stories of our elders

In a never-ending chain

_________________________________

We know the way

_________________________________

We were voyagers.

_________________________________

We were voyagers!

_________________________________

We were voyagers! We were voyagers!

_________________________________

We were voyagers!

_________________________________

Why'd we stop?

_________________________________

Maui.

_________________________________

When he stole from the mother island,

darkness fell.

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Te Kā awoke.

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Monsters lurked

and boats stopped coming back.

_________________________________
To protect our people,

the ancient chiefs forbid voyaging...

_________________________________

and now we have forgotten who we are.

_________________________________

And the darkness

has continued to spread...

_________________________________

chasing away our fish...

_________________________________

draining the life...

_________________________________

from island after island.

_________________________________

Our island.

_________________________________

But, one day...

_________________________________

someone will journey beyond our reef,

find Maui...

_________________________________

deliver him across the great ocean...

_________________________________

to restore the heart of Te Fiti.

_________________________________

I was there that day.

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The ocean chose you.

_________________________________

I thought it was a dream.

_________________________________

(YELPS)

_________________________________

Nope!

_________________________________

Our ancestors

believed Maui lies there...

_________________________________

at the bottom of his hook.

_________________________________

Follow it, and you will find him.

_________________________________

But why would it choose me?

_________________________________

I don't even know

how to make it past the reef.

_________________________________

But I know who does!

_________________________________

(SIGHS)

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VILLAGER 1: The crops

are turning black.

_________________________________

VILLAGER 2: What about the fish?

_________________________________

VILLAGER 3:

This is happening all over the island.

_________________________________

-Please, please settle down.

-What are you going to do?

_________________________________

We will dig new fields.

We will find a way to...

_________________________________

We can stop the darkness!

Save our island!

_________________________________

There's a cavern of boats.

_________________________________

Huge canoes.

_________________________________

We can take them, find Maui,

make him restore the heart.

_________________________________

We were voyagers.

We can voyage again!

_________________________________

You told me to help our people.

_________________________________

This is how we help our people.

_________________________________

Dad?

_________________________________

What are you doing?

_________________________________

I should've burned those boats

a long time ago!

_________________________________

No! Don't!

_________________________________

We have to find Maui.

We have to restore the heart!

_________________________________

There is no heart!

_________________________________

This is just a rock!

_________________________________

No!

_________________________________

(HORN BLOWING)

_________________________________

Chief! It's your mother!

_________________________________

Mother...

_________________________________

TUI: What can be done?

_________________________________

(VILLAGERS TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

_________________________________

(WEAKLY) Go.

_________________________________

Gramma.

_________________________________

Go.

_________________________________

Not now. I can't.

_________________________________

You must!

_________________________________

The ocean chose you.

_________________________________

Follow the fish hook.

_________________________________

Gramma...

_________________________________

And when you find Maui...

_________________________________

you grab him by the ear. You say...

_________________________________

"I am Moana of Motunui.

_________________________________

"You will board my boat...

_________________________________

"sail across the sea...

_________________________________

"and restore the heart of Te Fiti."

_________________________________

(VOICE BREAKING) I can't leave you.

_________________________________

There is nowhere you could go

that I won't be with you.

_________________________________

Go!

_________________________________

There's a line

where the sky meets the sea

_________________________________

And it calls me

_________________________________

But no one knows

_________________________________

How far it goes

_________________________________

All that time wondering where I need

to be is behind me

_________________________________

I'm on my own

_________________________________

To worlds unknown

_________________________________

Every turn I take

Every trail I track

_________________________________

Is a choice I make

_________________________________

Now I can't turn back

from the great unknown

_________________________________

Where I go alone

Where I long to be

_________________________________

See her light up the night in the sea

_________________________________

She calls me

_________________________________

And yes, I know

_________________________________

That I can go

_________________________________

There's a moon in the sky

And the wind is behind me

_________________________________

Soon I'll know

_________________________________

How far I'll go

_________________________________
_________________________________

Hey, did it work, Miss Sally?

_________________________________

Did you set him straight

_________________________________

with your lawyerly powers
of persuasion?

_________________________________

Is he ready to start training?

_________________________________

Well, Stinky... Stickers?

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

Yes, Mater, I am.

_________________________________

Whoo-hoo!

_________________________________

I decide when I'm done.

_________________________________

I was hoping you'd say that.

_________________________________

Okay, but I got an idea.

_________________________________

And I'm gonna need to talk
to Rusty and Dusty, all right?

_________________________________

Oh, I'll get them on the horn.

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Get it? On the horn?

_________________________________

(HONKS AND LAUGHS)

_________________________________

Oops. Hold on. Got to sneeze.

(GASPING)

_________________________________

Dadgum, I lost it.
Hey, I'll see you at Flo's.

_________________________________

(SNEEZES LOUDLY)

_________________________________

I found it.

_________________________________

Hey, watch your step.
_________________________________

_________________________________
(MICKEY MOUSE MARCH PLAYING)
_________________________________
Ahem!
_________________________________

Good morning, Your Majesty.
_________________________________
It's nice to see you this morn...
_________________________________
What!

_________________________________

(CRAZY QUACKING)
_________________________________

Wake up, Goofy, wake up!
This is serious!
_________________________________
(SNORING)

_________________________________
-(QUACKS)
-Whoa!

_________________________________

Hey there, Donald. Good morning.

_________________________________

We've got a problem, Goofy!
But don't tell anyone...

_________________________________

Queen Minnie?

_________________________________

-Not even the queen.

-Daisy?

_________________________________

(QUACKS) No, it's top secret!

_________________________________

Good morning, ladies.

_________________________________

What?
_________________________________
(DAISY CLEARS THROAT)
_________________________________
(LAUGHS)
_________________________________

_________________________________

(INSTRUMENTAL CELTIC

MUSIC PLAYING)

_________________________________

NARRATOR: On the clearest of nights,

_________________________________

when the winds of the Etherium

were calm and peaceful,

_________________________________

(SHIP CREAKING)

_________________________________

the great merchant ships,

_________________________________

with their cargoes

of Arcturian solar crystals,

_________________________________

felt safe and secure.

_________________________________

Little did they suspect

that they were pursued by

_________________________________

pirates.

_________________________________

And the most feared of all these pirates

_________________________________

was the notorious

Captain Nathaniel Flint.

_________________________________

Fire!

_________________________________

(ALL GASPING)

_________________________________

Aah!

_________________________________

Like a Candarian zaftwing

overtaking its prey...

_________________________________

SARAH: James Pleiades Hawkins.

_________________________________

I thought you were asleep an hour ago.

_________________________________

Mom, I was just getting to the best part.

_________________________________

Please?

_________________________________

Oh! Can those eyes get any bigger?

_________________________________

Scootch over.

_________________________________

NARRATOR:

...like a Candarian zaftwing

_________________________________

overtaking its prey,

_________________________________

Flint and his band of renegades

_________________________________

swooped in out of nowhere.

_________________________________

(LAUGHING EVILLY)

_________________________________

And then, gathering up their spoils,

_________________________________

vanished without a trace.

_________________________________

-Ooh!

-Ooh!

_________________________________

NARRATOR: Flint's secret trove

was never found,

_________________________________

but stories have persisted

that it remains hidden

_________________________________

somewhere at the farthest

reaches of the galaxy,

_________________________________

stowed with riches

beyond imagination,

_________________________________

the loot of a thousand worlds,

_________________________________

-Treasure Planet.

-Treasure Planet.

_________________________________

Okay. Blow your nose.

_________________________________

(HONKING)

_________________________________

How do you think

Captain Flint did it, Mom?

_________________________________

How'd he swoop in out of nowhere

and vanished without a trace?

_________________________________

I have no idea.

_________________________________

Come here, you...

_________________________________

I'm gonna get...

(BLOWING RASPBERRY)

_________________________________

(GIGGLING)

_________________________________

Okay, now it's time for

this little spacer to go to sleep.

_________________________________

You think somebody'll

ever find Treasure Planet?

_________________________________

Sweetheart, I think it's more

_________________________________

like a legend.

_________________________________

I know it's real.

_________________________________

You win. It's real.

_________________________________

-Nighty-night, Mom.

-Nighty-night, sweetheart.

_________________________________

I love you.

_________________________________

Love you, too.

_________________________________

_________________________________

(CHATTERING)

_________________________________

(GASPING) Hercules!

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Behave yourself.

_________________________________

(GURGLING)

_________________________________

Look at this.

_________________________________

Look how cute he is.

_________________________________

-(BABBLING)

-(COOING)

_________________________________

Hah!

_________________________________

Oh, he's strong like his dad, hmm?

_________________________________

Whoa! Excuse me! Hot stuff coming

through! Excuse me. One side, Ares.

_________________________________

Why, Hermes, they're lovely.

_________________________________

Yeah, you know,

I had Orpheus do the arrangement.

_________________________________

Isn't that too nutty?

_________________________________

Fabulous party. You know,

_________________________________

I haven't seen this much love in a room

since Narcissus discovered himself.

_________________________________

(KISSING SOUNDS)

_________________________________

Dear, keep those away from the baby.

_________________________________

He won't hurt himself.

_________________________________

Let the kid have a little fun.

_________________________________

(GODS GASPING)

_________________________________

On behalf of my son,

_________________________________

I want to thank you all

for your wonderful gifts!

_________________________________

What about our gift, dear?

_________________________________

Well, let's see here. We'll take...

Hmm, yes.

_________________________________

A little cirrus

and, hmm, a touch of nimbostratus

_________________________________

and a dash of cumulus.

_________________________________

(SQUEAKS)

_________________________________

(HONKS)

_________________________________

His name is Pegasus,

_________________________________

and he's all yours, son.

_________________________________

(HIGH-PITCHED WHINNY)

_________________________________

(GODS SIGHING)

_________________________________

Mind his head.

_________________________________

He's so tiny.

_________________________________

(YAWNS)

_________________________________

My boy.

_________________________________

My little Hercules.

_________________________________

HADES: How sentimental.

_________________________________

You know,

I haven't been this choked up

_________________________________

since I got a hunk of moussaka

caught in my throat! Huh?

_________________________________

So is this an audience or a mosaic?

_________________________________

Hey, how you doin'?

Lookin' good. Nice dress.

_________________________________

So, Hades, you finally made it.

How are things in the underworld?

_________________________________

Well, they're just fine.

You know, a little dark, a little gloomy.

_________________________________

And, as always,

hey, full of dead people.

_________________________________

What are you gonna do?

_________________________________

There's the little sunspot.

Little snootchie.

_________________________________

And here is a sucker

for the little sucker, eh?

_________________________________

Here you go. Ya just...

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

_________________________________

-Sheesh.

-(LAUGHING)

_________________________________

Uh, powerful little tyke.

_________________________________

Come on, Hades. Don't be such a stiff.

Join the celebration!

_________________________________

Hey.

_________________________________

Love to, babe, but unlike you gods

lounging about up here,

_________________________________

I regrettably have a full-time gig

_________________________________

that you, by the way,

so charitably bestowed on me, Zeus.

_________________________________

So, can't. Love to, but can't.

_________________________________

You ought to slow down.

You'll work yourself to death.

_________________________________

Hah! Work yourself to death!

(LAUGHING)

_________________________________

(CROWD LAUGHING)

_________________________________

Oh, I kill myself!

_________________________________

(FAKE LAUGH) If only. If only.

_________________________________

If there's one god you don't want to

get steamed up, it's Hades.

_________________________________

'Cause he had an evil plan.

_________________________________
(SINGING) He ran the underworld

_________________________________

But thought the dead

were dull and uncouth

_________________________________

He was as mean as he was ruthless

_________________________________

-And that's the gospel truth

-(GROWLING)

_________________________________

He had a plan to shake things up

_________________________________

And that's the gospel truth

_________________________________

Pain!

_________________________________

Coming, your most lugubriousness.

_________________________________

Ow! (GRUNTING)

_________________________________

(YELLS)

_________________________________

Panic!

_________________________________

I'm sorry. I can handle it!

_________________________________

(YELLS)

_________________________________

-Pain! Ohh!

-And Panic!

_________________________________

-Reporting for duty!

-Reporting for duty!

_________________________________

Fine, fine, fine.

_________________________________

Just let me know

the instant the Fates arrive.

_________________________________

Oh. They're here.

_________________________________

What? The Fates are here,

and you didn't tell me?

_________________________________

(BOTH WHIMPERING, GROANING)

_________________________________

-We are worms! Worthless worms!

-We are worms! Worthless worms!

_________________________________

Memo to me, memo to me.

Maim you after my meeting.

_________________________________

Darling, hold that mortal's thread of life

_________________________________

good and tight.

_________________________________

(WOMAN SCREAMING)

_________________________________

Incoming!

_________________________________

(FATES LAUGHING)

_________________________________

Ladies! Hah! I am so sorry that I'm...

_________________________________

-Late!

-Late!

_________________________________

-We knew you would be.

-We know everything.

_________________________________

-Past.

-Present.

_________________________________

And Future.

_________________________________

Indoor plumbing, it's gonna be big.

_________________________________

Great, great. Anyway, see, ladies,

I was at this party, and I lost track of...

_________________________________

-TOGETHER: We know!

-Yeah. I know you know.

_________________________________

So here's the deal. Zeus,

_________________________________

Mr. High and Mighty, Mr. "Hey, you,

get off of my cloud, " now he has...

_________________________________

-TOGETHER: A bouncing baby brat.

-We know!

_________________________________

I know you know. I know.

I got it. I got the concept.

_________________________________

So let me just ask.

_________________________________

Is this kid gonna mess up

my hostile takeover bid, or what?

_________________________________

What do you think?

_________________________________

No, you don't.

We're not supposed to reveal the future.

_________________________________

(SNIFFS)

_________________________________

Oh, wait. I'm sorry. Time out. Can I...

_________________________________

Can I ask you a question, by the way?

Are you...

_________________________________

Did you cut your hair or something?

You look fabulous.

_________________________________

I mean, you look like

a Fate worse than death.

_________________________________

-(GROANS) Oh, gross!

-It's blinkin'!

_________________________________

Ladies, please.

_________________________________

My fate is in your lovely hands.

_________________________________

-Oh, yeah!

-Oh, all right.

_________________________________

In 18 years precisely,

_________________________________

the planets will align ever so nicely.

_________________________________

Ay, verse. Oy.

_________________________________

The time to act will be at hand.

_________________________________

Unleash the Titans,

your monstrous band.

_________________________________

Mm-hmm. Good, good.

_________________________________

Then the once-proud Zeus

will finally fall,

_________________________________

and you, Hades, will rule all!

_________________________________

Yes! Hades rules!

_________________________________

A word of caution to this tale.

_________________________________

Excuse me?

_________________________________

Should Hercules fight, you will fail.

_________________________________

(FATES CACKLING)

_________________________________

What?

_________________________________

Okay, fine, fine. I'm cool. I'm fine.

_________________________________

(BELL DINGS)

_________________________________

Pain? Panic? Got a little riddle for ya.

_________________________________

How do you kill a god?

_________________________________

-I do not know!

-You can't. They're immortal?

_________________________________

Bingo! They're immortal.

_________________________________

So, first you got to turn

the little sunspot mortal.

_________________________________

(WHISTLING SNORES)

_________________________________

(GLASS BREAKING)

_________________________________

(PAIN, PANIC TITTERING)

_________________________________

-What? What is it?

-Huh?

_________________________________

-The baby!

-The baby!

_________________________________

-(GASPING)

-(SPUTTERING)

_________________________________

Hercules!

_________________________________

Oh! (SOBBING)

_________________________________

No!

_________________________________

Now we did it!

_________________________________

Zeus is gonna use us

for target practice!

_________________________________

Just hang onto the kid, Panic.

_________________________________

-(GRUNTING)

-(CRYING)

_________________________________

Hurry!

_________________________________

Let's just kill the kid

and get it over with, okay?

_________________________________

Here you go, kid.

A little Grecian formula.

_________________________________

Look at that! He's changing.

Can we do it now?

_________________________________

No, he has to drink the whole potion.

Every last drop.

_________________________________

AMPHITRYON: Who's there?

_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAMING)

_________________________________

-Alcmene, over here.

-(CRYING)

_________________________________

(GASPS)

_________________________________

You poor thing.

_________________________________

-Oh, don't cry.

-Is anybody there?

_________________________________

-Now?

-Now.

_________________________________

(ALCMENE MUTTERING)

_________________________________

Oh. Well,

he must have been abandoned.

_________________________________

Amphitryon, for so many years

_________________________________

we've prayed to the gods

to bless us with a child.

_________________________________

-Perhaps they've answered our prayers.

-Perhaps they have.

_________________________________

"Hercules"?

_________________________________

(THUNDERCLAP)

_________________________________

(GROWLING)

_________________________________

(GIGGLING)

_________________________________

(SNAKES SPUTTERING)

_________________________________

(YELLING)

_________________________________

(GIGGLING)

_________________________________

Help, help, help!

_________________________________

Hades is gonna kill us

when he finds out what happened.

_________________________________

You mean, if he finds out.

_________________________________

Of course he's gonna...

_________________________________

If. If is good.

_________________________________

CALLIOPE: It was tragic.

_________________________________

Zeus led all the gods

on a frantic search.

_________________________________

But by the time they found the baby,

it was too late.

_________________________________
(SINGING) Young Herc was mortal now

_________________________________

But since he did not drink the last drop

_________________________________

He still retained his godlike strength

_________________________________

So thank his lucky stars

_________________________________

Tell it, girl.

_________________________________

But Zeus and Hera wept

_________________________________

Because their son

could never come home

_________________________________

They'd have to watch their precious

baby grow up from afar

_________________________________

Though Hades' horrid plan

_________________________________

Was hatched before

Herc cut his first tooth

_________________________________

The boy grew stronger every day

_________________________________
And that's the gospel truth

_________________________________

The gospel truth

_________________________________

_________________________________

Ah, salaam and good evening

to you, worthy friend.

_________________________________

Please, please, come closer.

_________________________________

Too close. A little too close.

_________________________________

There.

_________________________________

Welcome to Agrabah,

_________________________________

city of mystery, of enchantment,

_________________________________

and the finest merchandise

this side of the River Jordan,

_________________________________

on sale today. Come on down.

_________________________________

Look at this. Yes.

_________________________________

Combination hookah and coffeemaker.

Also makes julienne fries.

_________________________________

Will not break. Will not...

_________________________________

It broke.

_________________________________

Ohh! Look at this.

_________________________________

I have never seen

one of these intact before.

_________________________________

This is the famous

Dead Sea Tupperware.

_________________________________

Listen. Ah, still good.

_________________________________

Wait. Don't go.

_________________________________

I can see that you're only interested

in the exceptionally rare.

_________________________________

I think, then, you would be

most rewarded to consider this.

_________________________________

Do not be fooled

by its commonplace appearance.

_________________________________

Like so many things,

it is not what is outside,

_________________________________

but what is inside that counts.

_________________________________

This is no ordinary lamp.

_________________________________

It once changed the course

of a young man's life.

_________________________________

A young man who, like this lamp,

was more than what he seemed.

_________________________________

A diamond in the rough.

_________________________________

Perhaps you would like to hear the tale?

_________________________________

It begins on a dark night,

_________________________________

where a dark man waits

_________________________________

with a dark purpose.

_________________________________

(HORSE NICKERS)

_________________________________

You are late.

_________________________________

A thousand apologies, O patient one.

_________________________________

You have it, then?

_________________________________

I had to slit a few throats, but I got it.

_________________________________

Ah-ah-ahhh.

_________________________________

The treasure.

_________________________________

Ow!

_________________________________

Trust me, my pungent friend.

_________________________________

-You'll get what's coming to you.

-What's coming to you. Awk!

_________________________________

Quickly! Follow the trail.

_________________________________

Faster.

_________________________________

(HORSE NEIGHS)

_________________________________

(WIND HOWLING)

_________________________________

JAFAR: At last,

after all my years of searching,

_________________________________

the Cave of Wonders.

_________________________________

Awk. Cave of Wonders.

_________________________________

By Allah.

_________________________________

Now, remember. Bring me the lamp.

_________________________________

The rest of the treasure is yours,

but the lamp is mine.

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

Awk, the lamp. Awk, the lamp.

_________________________________

Jeez, where'd you dig this bozo up?

_________________________________

Shh.

_________________________________

(ECHOING RUMBLE)

_________________________________

-Who disturbs my slumber?

-(THIEF GASPS)

_________________________________

It is I, Gazeem, a humble thief.

_________________________________

Know this.

_________________________________

Only one may enter here,

_________________________________

one whose worth lies far within.

_________________________________

A diamond in the rough.

_________________________________

What are you waiting for? Go on.

_________________________________

(BEAST SIGHING)

_________________________________

-(ROARING)

-(SCREAMING)

_________________________________

No!

_________________________________

Seek thee out the diamond in the rough.

_________________________________

(COUGHING)

_________________________________

I can't believe it. I just don't believe it.

_________________________________

We're never gonna get

a hold of that stupid lamp.

_________________________________

Just forget it. Look at this.

I'm so ticked off that I'm moulting.

_________________________________

Patience, Iago. Patience.

_________________________________

Gazeem was obviously

less than worthy.

_________________________________

Oh, there's a big surprise.

_________________________________

I think I'm gonna have a heart attack

and die from that surprise.

_________________________________

What are we gonna do?

We got a big problem here, a big...

_________________________________

Yes.

_________________________________

Only one may enter.

_________________________________

I must find this one, this...

_________________________________

Diamond in the rough.
_________________________________

_________________________________

(BELL TOLLING)

_________________________________

-(DOG BARKING)

-(CARRIAGE APPROACHING)

_________________________________

(HORSE WHINNIES, NEIGHS)

_________________________________

You know, Daddy,

this is my very best birthday.

_________________________________

But I haven't given you

your present yet.

_________________________________

-What is it? What is it?

-(CHUCKLES) Now, close your eyes.

_________________________________

Oh, oh, oh... Oh, now...

_________________________________

-No peeking now.

-(GIGGLING)

_________________________________

-(SOFT MUSIC PLAYS)

-(GASPING)

_________________________________

Oh, Daddy!

_________________________________

You made this just for me?

_________________________________

(PANTING)

_________________________________

(FIENDISH CACKLING)

_________________________________

You're the most wonderful father

in the whole world!

_________________________________

(RATTLING)

_________________________________

-OLIVIA: (GASPS) Who is that?

-I... I don't know!

_________________________________

Quickly, dear,

stay in here and don't come out.

_________________________________

(CACKLING)

_________________________________

(GRUNTING, STRUGGLING)

_________________________________

(STRUGGLING CONTINUES)

_________________________________

(GLASS BREAKS)

_________________________________

FIDGET: I got you, toy maker!

FLAVERSHAM: Oh, no! Olivia!

_________________________________

(DOOR CLOSES)

_________________________________

(CREAKING)

_________________________________

Daddy, where are you?

_________________________________

Daddy,

_________________________________

where are you?

_________________________________

Daddy!

_________________________________

_________________________________

(HORN HONKING)

_________________________________

-Car's here!

-FATHER: It's 9:00!

_________________________________

We're going to miss our flight!

_________________________________
MOTHER: Traveler's checks...
FATHER: You have the tickets?

_________________________________
MOTHER: Tabitha, did you feed Roddy?

_________________________________

Oops.

_________________________________
MOTHER: I just know

we've forgotten something.

_________________________________

Roddy, where are you?

_________________________________

We'll be back in a few days, so here's

enough food for you. Here's more.

_________________________________

-MOTHER: Tabitha!

-Here's a little more.

_________________________________
MOTHER: I hope you're

not overfeeding him.

_________________________________

Of course not, Mum.

_________________________________

-FATHER: Come on, Tabitha!

-Bye, Roddy.

_________________________________
FATHER: We don't want to miss

our holiday.

_________________________________

I'm coming, I'm coming!

_________________________________

(SNIFFING)

_________________________________

When the cat's away,

_________________________________

the mice will play!

_________________________________

The holiday starts now, everyone!

_________________________________

Music, maestro!

_________________________________

(DANCING WITH MYSELF PLAYING)

_________________________________

Hey, what are you all standing around

for? I got a big day planned!

_________________________________

Let's go, people! Chop-chop!

_________________________________

Nope. Nope. Nope. Nope.

_________________________________

Nope. Nope. Nope.

_________________________________

Hmm.

_________________________________

(INDISTINCT MUMBLING)

_________________________________

Mmm.

_________________________________

Ooh!

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

Buckle up, everyone.

_________________________________

And I'm dancing with myself

_________________________________

Oh, dancing with myself

_________________________________

Oh, dancing with myself

_________________________________

Well there's nothing to lose

_________________________________

Fore!

_________________________________

Oops. Sorry.

_________________________________

If I looked all over the world

_________________________________

And there's every type of girl

_________________________________

Game point. Service!

_________________________________

We win! We win, team! We win!

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

_________________________________

So let's sink another drink

_________________________________

'Cause it'll give me time to think

_________________________________

If I had the chance

I'd ask the world to dance

_________________________________

And I'll be dancing with myself

_________________________________

Perfect.

_________________________________

Oh, dancing with myself

_________________________________

Well, there's nothing to lose

And there's nothing to prove?

_________________________________

(BEEPING)

_________________________________

-(POPPING)

-(BLOWING)

_________________________________

Well, if I had a chance...

_________________________________

Having a good time, darling?

_________________________________

(CHOKING)

_________________________________

Oh, thank you.

_________________________________

See you tomorrow.

_________________________________

Oh, dancing with myself

_________________________________

Oh, dancing with myself

_________________________________

Oh, dancing with myself

_________________________________

(SIGHS)

_________________________________

Good night!

_________________________________

(ECHOING) Good night! Good night!

_________________________________

Yeah, well. Good night then, Roddy.

_________________________________

(RUMBLING)

_________________________________

(GASPS)

_________________________________

What was that?

_________________________________

Who's there?

_________________________________

Wake up. I think

there's someone in the house.

_________________________________

Sarge, wake up!

_________________________________
SARGE: Approaching enemy lines.

_________________________________

(RUMBLING)

_________________________________

-I'm armed and ready.

-At ease, soldier.

_________________________________

Give up your weapons

of mass destruction.

_________________________________

Shh! Shush!

_________________________________

-Come get me, enemy of freedom!

-Stop it. That's enough!

_________________________________

-Tell Mom I... Love... Her.

-(RUMBLING)

_________________________________

(GURGLING)

_________________________________

-RODDY: What?

-(GURGLING)

_________________________________

-Yee-ha!

-(GASPS)

_________________________________

(GASPS)

_________________________________

Oh.

_________________________________

-(SCREAMING)

-(BELCHING)

_________________________________

(BELCHING)

_________________________________

(BELCHING CONTINUES)

_________________________________

Whoa! (SMACKING LIPS) Ha!

_________________________________

They do not, repeat, not have

food like this in the sewer.

_________________________________

A sewer rat! Who... What...

How did you get here?

_________________________________

I don't know. One minute I'm in the pub.

_________________________________

Next thing you know, whoosh!

_________________________________

It's a burst water main!

Off I go, shooting up the pipes.

_________________________________

And, well, here I am.

_________________________________

I have a plunger.

We can shoot you right back.

_________________________________

Do you like seafood?

_________________________________

Can I call you a cab?

_________________________________

Bleah! See food! Get it?

_________________________________

Have you got a TV?

_________________________________

-Yes, but...

-Say no more!

_________________________________

No Leave that.

_________________________________

Geronimo!

_________________________________

No, don't... Touch anything.

_________________________________

Would you look at

the size of that monster?

_________________________________

-(GASPING AND SNIFFING)

-(SID CHUCKLES)

_________________________________
SID: Careful, mate.

Those aren't chocolate buttons.

_________________________________
COMMENTATOR: It's the match of the

century! The FIFA World Cup Final!

_________________________________

-England. Germany.

-SID: Yes! Boo!

_________________________________

Live this Sunday. be there.

_________________________________

This place is great!

I'm staying here forever!

_________________________________

What?

_________________________________

Game point. Service!

_________________________________

We win, we win! You lose! In your face!

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

_________________________________

(GROWLING)

_________________________________

-Huh?

-Right, my friend.

_________________________________

You don't belong here.

I'm afraid it's time for you to leave.

_________________________________

I would not do that if I was you, pal.

_________________________________

Let me lay this out for you.

This place is mine now.

_________________________________

Sid says, "Jump," you say,

"How high?" Comprende?

_________________________________

-(GASPING)

-Fetch us some Pop-Tarts

_________________________________

from the kitchen, Jeeves.

_________________________________

-Oh, and be snappy about it.

-Um...

_________________________________

Yes, sir. Right away, sir.

_________________________________

That's more like it.

_________________________________

But before breakfast is served,

_________________________________

perhaps sir would care

to take a whirl in the Jacuzzi.

_________________________________

A Jacuzzi?

_________________________________

You're a real gent.

_________________________________

After a hard day

of navigating sewer pipes,

_________________________________

there's nothing better than relaxing

in a Jacuzzi whirlpool bath.

_________________________________

That looks so inviting.

_________________________________

Yes. The water looks perfect!

_________________________________

Now you hop in, and I'll press this

lever to get the bubbles going.

_________________________________

Right. In we go!

_________________________________

Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

_________________________________

I know we got off

on the wrong foot before,

_________________________________

but I think we're

gonna get along, don't you?

_________________________________

Swimmingly.

_________________________________

-Be seeing you, my friend.

-(SCREAMING)

_________________________________

-SID: You plonker!

-(GASPING)

_________________________________

You think I don't know

a toilet when I see one?

_________________________________

You were going to flush me

down the loo.

_________________________________

No! It's a big Jacuzzi! Deluxe model!

_________________________________

Then you won't mind

if I get the bubbles going.

_________________________________

No! Not the lever!

Have mercy! No, I can't swim!

_________________________________

Bon voyage, me old cream cracker!

_________________________________

-Hold your nose!

-You can't do this!

_________________________________

You were going to try to flush me.

Let's see how you like it.

_________________________________

(ARE YOU GONNA BE

MY GIRL? PLAYING)

_________________________________

Ow! Ow! Ooh!

_________________________________

Aah!

_________________________________

-Have you seen my dad?

-(YELPS)

_________________________________

(SCREAMING)

_________________________________

(GASPING)

_________________________________

Aah!

_________________________________

Oh. (GASPS)

_________________________________

Oh! No! No!

_________________________________

(GROANING) Aah!

_________________________________

Oh, no, I can't swim!

I can't swim! I can't...

_________________________________

Swim.

_________________________________

I'm in the sewer!

_________________________________

No!

_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAM)

_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAM LOUDER)

_________________________________

(BOTH SHUDDERING)

_________________________________

-(CLATTERING)

-(GASPS)

_________________________________

Hello? (ECHOING)

_________________________________

Help? (ECHOING)

_________________________________

I'm gonna open my eyes and be

home. This is all a bad dream.

_________________________________

I'm not home! I wanna go home!

_________________________________

Shush! Stop it, Roddy!

_________________________________

I want to go home!

Pull yourself together!

_________________________________

I can't. I'm frightened.

_________________________________

Stop it, stop it, stop it!

_________________________________

All right, Roddy, old man,

_________________________________

you can get yourself out

of here, and you will.

_________________________________

Never forget,

_________________________________

the blood of the courageous James clan

_________________________________

flows through your veins.

_________________________________

-(SCREAMING)

-(ALL SCREAMING)

_________________________________

-(HORN HONKING)

-(PANTING)

_________________________________

-(SLUG SCREAMING)

-MALE: Extra! Extra!

_________________________________

Read all about it!

_________________________________

A way out! Yes!

_________________________________

(LAUGHING)

_________________________________

(YELLING)

_________________________________

(GROANING)

_________________________________

Aah!

_________________________________

Hey! That-a took

me three years to draw!

_________________________________

I'm terribly sorry. Three years?

_________________________________

I just-a finished it this morning!

_________________________________

Three years?

_________________________________

(GASPING)

_________________________________

-Good grief!

-(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

_________________________________

-What is this place?

-MALE: Hold the bus!

_________________________________

Feed the flies! Tuppence a bag!

_________________________________

It's a real city! Ah!

_________________________________

(SHOUTING)

_________________________________

My smalls!

_________________________________

-Is it a bird?

-Is it a plane?

_________________________________

Is that guy wearing my underpants?

_________________________________

Make him move, honey.

_________________________________

Boy, you got a face like a frying pan!

_________________________________

-Come on!

-I don't think he speaks English.

_________________________________

Hey, he moved! Did you get it?

_________________________________

-Got it!

-Good.

_________________________________

Sorry, sorry.

_________________________________

(GRUNTS)

_________________________________

-It's coming!

-What? Where? Who?

_________________________________

The Great Flood!

_________________________________

Those floodgates won't hold

forever, you know! We're doomed!

_________________________________

You think you can

back away from the truth!

_________________________________

'Ello, hello, hello. What's all this then?

_________________________________

Thank heavens! A policeman!

This wacko has been chasing after me!

_________________________________

Morning, Harold.

_________________________________

-Morning, Collin. How are you?

-Can't complain.

_________________________________

Keep an eye on this one.

He's a bit of a loony.

_________________________________

-What? Me?

-We're doomed!

_________________________________

-Are you kidding me?

-Right.

_________________________________

-Let's give you a police escort home.

-Oh, great!

_________________________________

Um, I live in Kensington.

Up there. The surface.

_________________________________

Up Top? Oh, no. No, no, no.

_________________________________

The humans don't like our sort.

_________________________________

Speak for yourself.

They like me very much up there.

_________________________________

I don't like your attitude.

I've got my eye on you, sunshine.

_________________________________

-Ooh! Ooh, hot, hot, hot!

-So...

_________________________________

You're trying to get Up Top, me hearty?

_________________________________

-Yes.

-(SIZZLING)

_________________________________

There's one person 'round here

might be able to help you.

_________________________________

-Might.

-Really?

_________________________________

Shady customer.

The captain of the Jammy Dodger.

_________________________________

-If you can find it.

-I know where it is!

_________________________________
PEGLEG: And remember, the name

of the boat's the Jammy Dodger.

_________________________________

Uh, thanks for bringing me this far.

_________________________________

-You're welcome.

-See ya!

_________________________________

(WHISTLING)

_________________________________

(EERIE DRONE)

_________________________________

(WHISTLING)

_________________________________

Beware.

_________________________________

Beware.

_________________________________

Hello?

_________________________________

Uh, permission to come aboard?

_________________________________

-(BOARDS CREAKING)

-Ahoy there?

_________________________________

Uh...

_________________________________

(GASPS)

_________________________________

Ow! Yah! Oh. Oh!

_________________________________

Sorry. I didn't mean to intrude,

Mr. Captain, Skipper, Thingy.

_________________________________

Hey! That's Miss Captain

Skipper Thingy to you.

_________________________________

Oops.

_________________________________

What are you doing on my boat?

_________________________________

I've had a bad day and need I your help.

_________________________________

I was thrown out of my own home,

flushed down my own toilet.

_________________________________

Thank you, too much information.

I've got my own problems.

_________________________________
SPIKE: She's around here somewhere!

_________________________________

Stay down. And keep quiet.

_________________________________

Why? Who are we hiding from?

_________________________________

I said quiet! There's rats

after me who'd like to kill me.

_________________________________

Well, I'll contain my amazement.

_________________________________

(GROANS)

_________________________________

All right, all right. Quiet as a mouse.

_________________________________

(HORN BLARING)

_________________________________

-(GASPS)

-Ah!

_________________________________
SPIKE: Over there!

_________________________________

You idiot!

_________________________________

Sorry about that. (CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

I'll be off then.

_________________________________

Sorry. Ah!

_________________________________

-(HORN BLARES)

-Sorry. Sorry.

_________________________________

Sorry!

_________________________________
SPIKE: We can't let her get away!

_________________________________

-(SCREAMING)

-Shh. Shh.

_________________________________

Come on, Jammy, me old mate,

don't do this to me!

_________________________________

-(GRUNTING)

-(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

_________________________________

-Oh.

-Ah!

_________________________________

Let me go, you pink-eyed freak!

_________________________________

-(GLASSES CLATTERING)

-I'm upset now.

_________________________________

Ah!

_________________________________

Whatever's going on, I'm not involved.

_________________________________

(SCREAMS) I'm an innocent bystander!

_________________________________

Rita, Rita, Rita!

_________________________________

(CACKLING)

_________________________________

You thought you could

give us the slip. (YELLING)

_________________________________

What are you looking at?

Keep still! Come on, then!

_________________________________

Right!

_________________________________

Who have we got here?

_________________________________

I believe he said his name

was Millicent Bystander.

_________________________________

-(SNORTING) Millicent!

-Actually, no...

_________________________________

Now, then, where's the ruby, Rita?

_________________________________

The boss wants it back.

_________________________________

I don't have your stupid ruby.

_________________________________

Okay, are we going

to do it the easy way

_________________________________

or the hard way?

_________________________________

I think we should do it

the easy way, don't you, Spike?

_________________________________

Oh.

_________________________________

(SIGHS)

_________________________________

All right. Check the tin.

_________________________________

Good girl.

_________________________________

See, Whitey, this is how I do it.

_________________________________

Watch and learn, my son. Watch and...

_________________________________

(YELPS)

_________________________________

Was it in there?

_________________________________

Right! Rip it up, lads!

_________________________________

Hey, you get your

filthy paws off my stuff!

_________________________________

It's in here somewhere.

I can feel it in me guts!

_________________________________

That'll be last night's curry.

_________________________________

I'm the same.

I got a bum like the Japanese flag.

_________________________________

Will you please tell them

I'm not involved in this?

_________________________________

Fine. All right, all right, listen up.

_________________________________

This gentleman,

he's not from around here.

_________________________________

Thank you.

_________________________________

Just look how nicely he's dressed.

_________________________________

-Oh, thank you.

-And why?

_________________________________

Because he's an

international jewel thief!

_________________________________

Precisely. What? No, no!

_________________________________

-He stole the ruby from me!

-No, she's lying!

_________________________________

All right, all right! It's time to bring out

_________________________________

the Persuader.

_________________________________

(ALL GASP)

_________________________________
SPIKE: Your choice, mate.

You can talk now

_________________________________

or you can talk later.

Ain't that right, Persuader?

_________________________________

Yeah, in a much higher voice!

_________________________________

The Persuader's alive, Spike!

_________________________________

You'll be singing like a tea kettle.

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Good one, Persuader.

_________________________________

I don't even know her!

I don't know anything!

_________________________________

Careful, miss. You'll injure yourself.

_________________________________

I know where it is!

_________________________________

Come on, then, Spit it out!

_________________________________

Don't you dare!

_________________________________

Look at her bottom.

Is it me, or is it oddly shaped?

_________________________________

You little snitch.

_________________________________

The booty's in the booty.

_________________________________

Hey! (GRUNTING)

_________________________________

ALL: Oh.

_________________________________

(LAUGHING)

_________________________________

Thanks, mate! The boss is

gonna be so happy with us.

_________________________________

You're toast.

_________________________________

(LAUGHING)

_________________________________

So you're from Up Top, eh?

_________________________________

I used to work in a laboratory Up Top.

_________________________________

Yeah. Big shampoo job.

_________________________________

I was dark grey when we started.

_________________________________

Yeah.

_________________________________

Still, it cleared up

me dandruff. (CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

COMMENTATOR:

The World Cup has become 

_________________________________

the most popular sporting event

_________________________________

Are you there, boss? We're back.

_________________________________

I've got it, boss.

_________________________________

The ruby. I found it.

_________________________________

Technically, Spike,

it was Millicent that found it.

_________________________________

Actually, the name's Roddy.

_________________________________

In exchange for my assistance,

I was hoping you might...

_________________________________

(FLY YELPING)

_________________________________

You might help me

out of the pickle I'm in.

_________________________________

(YELLS AND SHUDDERS)

_________________________________

Hello, Rita.

_________________________________

Hello, handsome.

_________________________________

And who is this?

Is your new boyfriend a waiter?

_________________________________

-Boyfriend?

-Waiter?

_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) The prize returns to me.

_________________________________

Did you imagine that

I'd let you steal it from me?

_________________________________

What? The jewels belongs

to my father, and you know it!

_________________________________

Your father? A good-for-nothing

scavenger, just like his daughter!

_________________________________

-(STRAINING)

-Uh, excuse me. Actually.

_________________________________

I'm the one that found your ruby.

_________________________________

So... You... Um...

_________________________________

Perhaps you'd repay the favor

and help me get home.

_________________________________

-(SQUEALS)

-(MOANS)

_________________________________

Help me!

_________________________________

Dispose of them.

_________________________________

No, no, no, please!

_________________________________

I just want to get home to Kensington!

_________________________________

(GASPS)

Kensington? The Royal Borough?

_________________________________

Up Top?

_________________________________

Uh, yes. Up Top.

_________________________________

Huzzah! A man of quality!

_________________________________

Finally, somebody gets it.

_________________________________

Come, let me show you

my private collection.

_________________________________

I know you'll find it diverting.

_________________________________

(LAUGHING) My shrine to beauty.

_________________________________

Works of high art crafted in tribute

to our beloved Royal Family.

_________________________________

Victoria's bust, wrought in porcelain.

_________________________________

Classy!

_________________________________

Quite lifelike, wouldn't you say?

_________________________________

(LAUGHS) It's as if she were here.

_________________________________

Mmm. Smooth to the touch.

_________________________________

-Easy, tiger.

-(GIGGLING)

_________________________________

But come! Let us restore the heart

_________________________________

and highlight of my collection

_________________________________

this ruby. Fallen from

the very brow of ancient kings.

_________________________________

A true crown jewel!

_________________________________

(RULE BRITANNIA PLAYS)

_________________________________

Well, what do you think?

_________________________________

He's a madman! Run away!

_________________________________

Pardon me. My fly's undone.

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Well, your ruby

certainly is a biggie.

_________________________________

Indeed.

_________________________________

How did it ever find me, here

in the underbelly of the world?

_________________________________

In this dark, low place.

_________________________________

Yes. I'd love to see more of your

collection. It's very amusing, but I...

_________________________________

-"Amusing"?

-(WINCING)

_________________________________

Didn't you say I'd find it amusing?

_________________________________

I said you'd find it

diverting, not amusing!

_________________________________

Ah, well, when I said "amusing"

I really meant it in the sense

_________________________________

of the ancient Greek muse,

the goddess of inspiration.

_________________________________

Muse.

_________________________________

-Smashing.

-(CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

-(GROWLING)

-Oh, heaven help me!

_________________________________

Ice him! Ice them both!

_________________________________

Let's see if there's

anything good in the fridge.

_________________________________

-Former enemies, one and all.

-(GASPING)

_________________________________
TOAD: A catalogue of thieves,

double-crossers and do-gooders.

_________________________________

(TOAD CACKLING)

_________________________________

Prepare to meet your maker.

_________________________________

Your ice maker. (CHORTLING)

_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Makes me laugh

every time, that one.

_________________________________

Shut that door.

_________________________________
RODDY: Liquid Nitrogen!

That will freeze us instantly!

_________________________________

There's a paper clip in my back pocket.

_________________________________

See if you can get it. (YELPS)

_________________________________

In the pocket, in the pocket!

_________________________________

Blimey, it's cold.

_________________________________

That's why I wore me mittens.

_________________________________

Huh? Hit men don't wear mittens!

_________________________________

Take them off! You're embarrassing me.

_________________________________

It's all right for you.

You've got little hands.

_________________________________

-Got it!

-WHITEY: They don't get as cold.

_________________________________

-I ain't got little hands!

-WHITEY: Yeah, you have.

_________________________________

You got lady's hands.

_________________________________

They might be small,

but they're lethal weapons.

_________________________________

You got your mother's hands.

_________________________________

Right. Put your hands together.

_________________________________

-(GROANING)

-(EXCLAIMS)

_________________________________

You could have wiped your feet.

_________________________________

Stop squirming!

_________________________________

-(ALARM RINGS)

-Goodbye, vermin.

_________________________________

Now, let me see the latest

addition to my cubist collection.

_________________________________

-What? Impossible!

-RITA: Oi! Kermit!

_________________________________

The prize returns to me!

_________________________________

You big, fat, slimy airbag!

_________________________________

(GROWLING) After them!

_________________________________

Why are you stopping?

Don't we have a plan?
_________________________________
"We"? Who's "we"?
_________________________________
You can't just leave me here!
_________________________________
Faster, you idiots! They're escaping!
_________________________________
(GROANING)
_________________________________
Oh, God! Oh...
_________________________________
(STRAINING)
_________________________________
No! Not the master cable!
_________________________________
We have a plan?
_________________________________
Put that back!
_________________________________
Wait, wait!
That will never hold both of us.
_________________________________
You're right. Toodle-oo.
_________________________________
Wait!
_________________________________
F-f-f-freeze!
_________________________________
Ah! (GRUNTS)
_________________________________
Oh, no!
_________________________________
No, don't break!
_________________________________
There are things I want to do,
sights I want to see!
_________________________________
-That wasn't on the list.
-Aah! Hey!
_________________________________
-Do something!
-(GASPS)
_________________________________
Huh?
_________________________________
Ow!
_________________________________
-(GROANING)
-(INHALING DEEPLY)
_________________________________
(BOTH SCREAM)
_________________________________
Keep your legs straight
when you hit the water!
_________________________________
I kept me legs straight, Spike.
_________________________________
(GROANING) Ow!
_________________________________
(PANTING) Good grief, that's high.
_________________________________
Quite high. Rather high.
So very, very high.
_________________________________
Hmm.
_________________________________
Hmm. Yeah.
_________________________________
Cool.
_________________________________
See ya!
_________________________________
Oh... If she can do it...
_________________________________
Here goes.
_________________________________
Ah! No!
_________________________________
Ah. (SCREAMS)
_________________________________
-(CRUNCHING)
-(WINCING)
_________________________________
-(CRUNCHING)
-Oh!
_________________________________
-(CRUNCHING)
-(WHIMPERS)
_________________________________
-(CRUNCHING)
-Ahh!
_________________________________
(GRUNTS)
_________________________________
And gently down.
_________________________________
Oh!
_________________________________
-My ball.
-It's my ball, it's mine.
_________________________________
Rita! Rita!
_________________________________
Oh, where is she? Rita!
_________________________________
Target at twelve o'clock!
_________________________________
Oh, come on!
_________________________________
Careful, Whitey. That's a banana skin.
_________________________________
Rita!
_________________________________
Whew. Over there!
_________________________________
(SQUEALING)
_________________________________
(HORN BLARING)
_________________________________
-Ah! Whoa! Oh.
-(SPIKE LAUGHING)
_________________________________
You look pretty
ridiculous now, Millicent.
_________________________________
Ahh!
_________________________________
Keep your legs straight!
_________________________________
(GRUNTS AND MOANS)
_________________________________
Oh...
_________________________________
-(GASPS)
-(SCREECHES)
_________________________________
What are you,
some kind of rat boomerang?
_________________________________
-Give me back my ruby!
-I haven't got your ruby!
_________________________________
Okay. Well, now I've got your ruby.
_________________________________
Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh.
_________________________________
Please be careful.
_________________________________
That ruby means a lot to me.
It's priceless!
_________________________________
Hold on.
_________________________________
-It's a fake.
-(TITTERING)
_________________________________
No, it's blooming not. It's real!
_________________________________
No, no, no, look, it's just glass.
_________________________________
-It's real!
-Fake.
_________________________________
-Real! Real!
-Fake. Fake.
_________________________________
-Real!
-Fake.
_________________________________
-Real!
-Look, look, look.
_________________________________
You can tell. Watch this.
_________________________________
(SHRIEKS)
_________________________________
There, you see?
You can't break a real ruby.
_________________________________
Right. I probably
shouldn't have done that.
_________________________________
Look on the bright side.
I save your neck.
_________________________________
Once The Toad knows it's worthless,
he'll stop chasing you for it.
_________________________________
-Roddy St. James saves the day.
-(RITA GRUNTS)
_________________________________
-Oh!
-(CRASH)
_________________________________
Good grief!
_________________________________
You try to do somebody
a favor, and they... Ow!
_________________________________
A favor? That ruby was from
Queen's Elizabeth's crown!
_________________________________
It fell down the drain
of Buckingham Palace!
_________________________________
Well, maybe the Queen
wears fake jewelry.
_________________________________
Keep still!
_________________________________
Can we just talk about this?
_________________________________
Real or not, that ruby
was going to change my life!
_________________________________
TAKEOUT: Han Chin Chinese takeout.
_________________________________
A madwoman's
attacking me with crayons!
_________________________________
-One chicken chow mein. With wonton?
-No, crayons!
_________________________________
No wonton! You want rice?
Fried or white?
_________________________________
-Fried. No, wait!
-You want wonton or what?
_________________________________
Cancel that order.
_________________________________
Rita?
_________________________________
Just go away, please.

_________________________________

Um...

_________________________________

I'm sorry.

_________________________________

(SCOFFS) Sorry?

_________________________________

Me and my dad worked

these drains for years.

_________________________________

He broke every bone in his body

trying to get that ruby.

_________________________________

(SIGHING) It was going to be

the answer to all our prayers.

_________________________________

Now it turns out it was a stupid fake.

_________________________________

Well...

_________________________________

Maybe I can make it up to you.

_________________________________

-Get stuffed.

-No, no, no.

_________________________________

I mean it. Back at my place, we've got

_________________________________

a jewelry box crammed with rubies

and diamonds. Real ones. So...

_________________________________

All you have to do

is get me home to Kensington

_________________________________

and I'll make you rich

beyond your wildest dreams.

_________________________________

(EXHALES DEEPLY)

_________________________________

How do I know this ain't

just a load of old rubbish?

_________________________________

Well, I suppose

you'll just have to trust me.

_________________________________

I must be out of my mind.

_________________________________

All right. You've got yourself a deal.

_________________________________

(SPITS)

_________________________________

Go on. You too.

_________________________________

You own hand.

_________________________________

(CLEARS THROAT)

_________________________________

(SQUISHING)
_________________________________

_________________________________

Who's there?

_________________________________

I'm warning you. I got ten claws

and I ain't afraid to use them.

_________________________________

-Hey, buddy. It's me, Elliot.

-What are you doing here?

_________________________________

You helped me, I'm returning the favor.

_________________________________

I'm busting you out of here.

Let's go. Let's do this.

_________________________________

Come on. Let's book it before

the warden makes her rounds.

_________________________________

No, cornflake. You've got it all twisted.

_________________________________

-This here is my home.

-Sweet.

_________________________________

Now haul your little butt

back out that window.

_________________________________

-What's this?

-Get off of that.

_________________________________

So soft. What is that?

_________________________________

What are you doing in there?

_________________________________

This place is big enough for two.

_________________________________

-What?

-Wow, look at that.

_________________________________

Does this look natural?

_________________________________

-Give me that.

-Oh, who's this little guy?

_________________________________

-Dinkleman.

-Dinkleman?

_________________________________

Is Dinkleman your doll?

_________________________________

I don't care about that old thing.

_________________________________

Oh, I get it. You're like a pet.

_________________________________

-I ain't nobody's pet.

-Right.

_________________________________

I do what I want, when I want,

and I come and go as I please.

_________________________________

Well, then let's go.

_________________________________

Outside?

_________________________________

Why would I wanna go outside

when I got all I need in...

_________________________________

Whoa, what's that?

_________________________________

I call them Woo Hoos, like:

_________________________________

You want one?

_________________________________

I know where there's a bunch of them,

but you gotta go...

_________________________________

...outside.

_________________________________

Inside. Outside.

_________________________________

-Inside. Outside.

-Stop it.

_________________________________

-Stupid nose.

-Inside. Outsi...

_________________________________

Okay, I got that Woo Hoo right out of

one of those container doohickeys.

_________________________________

You got that out the garbage?

_________________________________

I had that in my mouth and everything.

_________________________________

Dude, you're freaking me out

with that nose thing.

_________________________________

-Whoa.

-What is it?

_________________________________

-It's a whole Woo Hoo village.

-Sweet.

_________________________________

It's locked. Maybe we should

come back tomorrow.

_________________________________

Hey.

_________________________________

Elliot, look what you... You did.

_________________________________

You gonna get us in some trouble.

_________________________________

The Woo Hoo bar.

_________________________________

She's my lady. Smooth and creamy.

_________________________________

So bad, I shouldn't. Yet I will.

_________________________________

What is that?

_________________________________

Whoa, let me try.

_________________________________

Boog. Boog?

_________________________________

-Hello, idiot.

-It's "Elliot."

_________________________________

I come in peace.

_________________________________

I'm foraging.

_________________________________

Pepperoni!

_________________________________

-All right. Yeah, there it is. Let's go.

-Boog, party's over, let's go.

_________________________________

-All right, yeah, there it is.

-GORDY: Freeze.

_________________________________

Behold, the mighty grizzly. Good night.

_________________________________

If you go out in the woods today

There's gonna be some fries

_________________________________

Yeah, and the giraffes...

_________________________________

...they taste almost exactly

like the elephants.

_________________________________

That's messed up.

_________________________________

Hey, Gordy.

_________________________________

Back up quick, before she sees me.

_________________________________

You're in big trouble, mister.

_________________________________

You know what sugar does
to you, Boog.

_________________________________

Straight to bed, now!

_________________________________

I'm so sorry. It's my fault.

It won't happen again.

_________________________________

-What if he had hurt someone?

-Gordy, please.

_________________________________

-We're talking about Boog here.

-Hey, what are you looking at?

_________________________________

I told you not to wait up.

_________________________________

 -I'll take him back to the woods.

-It's time to put him where he belongs.

_________________________________

No, no, he's not ready to go back yet.

I mean, it's not my fault.

_________________________________

I tried to teach him the basics.

_________________________________

I took him fishing,

but he didn't wanna get wet.

_________________________________

 Gordy, please...

_________________________________

Boog is sorry.

_________________________________

-Beth, you're not his mother.

-I'm not mothering him.

_________________________________

Excuse me. Go to bed, Boog!

_________________________________

One more summer.

_________________________________

That's all I'm asking, one summer.

_________________________________

Great, see? I can be reasonable.
Thanks.

_________________________________

You know something?

_________________________________

The longer you wait, the harder

it's gonna be for him to adapt.

_________________________________

Oh, I'm sure he'll...
At least I think he'll...

_________________________________

And the harder it's gonna be

for you to let him go.

_________________________________

Good night, Beth.

_________________________________

What am I gonna do with you?

_________________________________

_________________________________

(MACHINERY POWERING DOWN)

_________________________________

-Riley's gone to sleep.

-Oh...

_________________________________

Which is a good thing.

_________________________________

When you think about it because

_________________________________

nothing else bad

can happen while she's asleep.

_________________________________

We'll be back to Headquarters

before she wakes up.

_________________________________

We'll just go across Friendship Island.

_________________________________

Oh, we'll never make it.

_________________________________

-Oh, no!

-No, no, no!

_________________________________

Don't obsess over

the weight of life's problems.

_________________________________

Remember the funny movie

where the dog dies?

_________________________________

Oh, Sadness,

we don't have time for this.

_________________________________

We'll just have to go around.

Take the scenic route.

_________________________________
SADNESS: Wait, Joy,

you could get lost in there!

_________________________________

Think positive!

_________________________________
SADNESS: Okay. I'm positive

you will get lost in there.

_________________________________
SADNESS: That's Long Term Memory.

_________________________________

An endless warren

of corridors and shelves.

_________________________________

I read about it in the manuals.

_________________________________

The manuals?

_________________________________

The manuals!

_________________________________

-You read the manuals!

-Yeah.

_________________________________

So you know

the way back to Headquarters!

_________________________________

I guess.

_________________________________

Ooh! (CHUCKLES EXCITEDLY)

_________________________________

You are my map!

_________________________________

Let's go! Lead on, my map!

_________________________________

Show me where we're going!

_________________________________

Okay. Only I'm too sad to walk.

_________________________________

Just give me a few... hours.

_________________________________

Ooh!

_________________________________
JOY: Which way? Left?

_________________________________
SADNESS: Right.

_________________________________

No. I mean, go left.

_________________________________

I said left was right. Like "correct."

_________________________________
JOY: Okay.

_________________________________
SADNESS: This actually

feels kind of nice.

_________________________________

Okay, here we go!

_________________________________

We'll be back to Headquarters

before morning.

_________________________________

We can do it! This will be easy!

This is working!

_________________________________

_________________________________
(McQUEEN INHALING
AND EXHALING DEEPLY)

_________________________________
McQUEEN: Okay... Here we go. Focus.
_________________________________

Speed. I am speed.
_________________________________

(CARS WHIZZING PAST)
_________________________________

One winner, 42 losers.
_________________________________

I eat losers for breakfast.
_________________________________

(CAR ACCELERATING)
_________________________________

Breakfast.
_________________________________

Wait, maybe I
should have had breakfast.
_________________________________

A little breck-y could be good for me.

No, no, no, stay focused. Speed.
_________________________________

(CARS WHIZZING)
_________________________________

I'm faster than fast. Quicker than quick.
_________________________________

I am lightning!
_________________________________

(POUNDING ON DOOR)
_________________________________
MACK: Hey, Lightning! You ready?
_________________________________

(REAL GONE PLAYING)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready.

_________________________________

(ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________

(ENGINE REVS)
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERS)
_________________________________

Ka-chow!
_________________________________

(CARS ZOOMING)
_________________________________

(CARS WHOOSHING)
_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAM)
_________________________________
(ALL CHEER)
_________________________________

Get your antenna balls here!
_________________________________

Go, Lightnin'!
_________________________________

-Whoo!
-You got that right, slick. (WHISTLES)
_________________________________

(AIR WRENCH WHIRRING)
_________________________________

Uh!
_________________________________

(SCREAMS)
_________________________________

(ENGINE REVS)

_________________________________
CUTLASS:
Welcome back to the Dinoco 400.
_________________________________
(CROWD CHEERS)
_________________________________

I'm Bob Cutlass, here
with my good friend, Darrell Cartrip.
_________________________________

We're midway through what may

be an historic day for racing.
_________________________________

Bob, my oil pressure's through the roof.
_________________________________

If this gets more exciting, they're

gonna have to tow me outta the booth!
_________________________________

Right, Darrell.

_________________________________
CUTLASS: Three cars are tied
for the season points lead,
_________________________________

heading into the final race of the season.
_________________________________

And the winner of this race will win
the season title and the Piston Cup.
_________________________________

Does The King, Strip Weathers,
_________________________________

have one more victory in him
before retirement?

_________________________________
DARRELL: He's been Dinoco's
golden boy for years!
_________________________________

Can he win them one last Piston Cup?

_________________________________
CUTLASS: And, as always, in the
second place spot we find Chick Hicks.
_________________________________

He's been chasing
that tailfin his entire career.

_________________________________
DARRELL: Chick thought
this was his year.
_________________________________

His chance to finally emerge
from The King's shadow.
_________________________________

But the last thing he expected was...

Lightning McQueen!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: You know, I don't think
anybody expected this.
_________________________________

The rookie sensation
came into the season unknown.
_________________________________

But everyone knows him now.
_________________________________
DARRELL: Will he be the first rookie
to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco?
_________________________________
CUTLASS: The legend, the runner-up,
and the rookie!
_________________________________

Three cars, one champion!
_________________________________

(BRAKES SCREECHING)
_________________________________

No, you don't.
_________________________________

-(CHUCKLING)

-Hey!
_________________________________

-(TIRES SQUEALING)

-(CROWD BOOING)
_________________________________

What a ride!
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

Go get 'em, McQueen! Go get 'em!
_________________________________
FEMALE: I love you, Lightning!
_________________________________

-Dinoco is all mine.

-(SCREAMING)
_________________________________
DARRELL: Trouble, turn three!

_________________________________
Get through that, McQueen.
_________________________________
CUTLASS:
Hugh crash behind the leaders!
_________________________________

(CROWD GASPS)
_________________________________

(SCREAMING)
_________________________________

(GIGGLING)
_________________________________

-(GRUNTS)

-(GASPS)
_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAMING)
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Wait a second, Darrell.
McQueen is in the wreckage.
_________________________________
DARRELL: There's no way the rookie
can make it through!
_________________________________

Not in one piece, that is.
_________________________________

(EXHALING)
_________________________________

Yeah!
_________________________________

Lightning! Oh!
_________________________________
DARRELL: Look at that!

McQueen made it through!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: A spectacular move

by Lightning McQueen!
_________________________________

Yeah! Ka-chow!
 _________________________________

McQueen! McQueen! McQueen!

McQueen! McQueen! McQueen!
_________________________________

Yeah, McQueen! Ka-chow! (HONKING)

_________________________________
CUTLASS: While everyone

heads into the pits,
_________________________________

McQueen stays out to take the lead!
_________________________________

Don't take me out, coach. I can still race!
_________________________________

(AIR WRENCH WHIRRING)
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) What do you think?

A thing of beauty.
_________________________________

-McQueen made it!
-HICKS: What?
_________________________________

He's not pitting!
_________________________________

You gotta get me out there!

Let's go! Get me back out there!
_________________________________

McQueen's not going into the pits!
_________________________________
DARRELL: The rookie fired his

crew chief. The third this season!
_________________________________

CUTLASS: Says he likes working alone.
_________________________________
Go, go!
_________________________________

Looks like Chick

got caught up in the pits.
_________________________________

Yeah, after a stop like that,

he's got a lot of ground to make up.
_________________________________

Get ready, boys,

we're coming to the restart!
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERS)
_________________________________

Come on, come on, come on!
_________________________________

We need tires now! Come on, let's go!

_________________________________
-No, no, no, no! No tires, just gas!
-CHUCK: What?
_________________________________

You need tires, you idiot!
_________________________________
DARRELL: Looks like it's
gas-and-go's for McQueen today.
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Right. No tires again.

_________________________________
DARRELL: That's a short-term gain,
long-term loss,
_________________________________

but it's workin' for him. He obviously
knows somethin' we don't know.
_________________________________

(CARS WHIZZING)
_________________________________
CUTLASS: This is it, Darrell.

_________________________________
One lap to go and Lightning McQueen
has a huge lead.
_________________________________

He's got it in the bag.

Call in the dogs and put out the fire!
_________________________________

We're gonna crown us a new champion!
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERS AND WHISTLES)
_________________________________

(SCREAMING)
_________________________________

-Checkered flag, here I come!

-(TIRE BLOWS)
_________________________________
DARRELL: No! McQueen's blown a tire!

_________________________________
CUTLASS: And with only one turn
to go! Can he make it?
_________________________________

-You fool!

-(GRUNTS)
_________________________________
MALE: McQueen's blown a tire!
He's blown a tire!
_________________________________

Go, go, go!
_________________________________

-(GRUNTING)

-(TIRE BLOWS)
_________________________________
DARRELL: He's lost another tire!
_________________________________

-King and Chick come up fast!
-CUTLASS: They're entering turn 3!
_________________________________

Come on. (GRUNTING)
_________________________________

I don't believe what I'm watching, Bob!
_________________________________

Lightning McQueen
is 100 feet from his Piston Cup!
_________________________________

(GASPING)
_________________________________

(GROWLING)
_________________________________
CUTLASS: The King and Chick
rounding turn four.
_________________________________
DARRELL: Down the stretch they come!
And it's, and it's...
_________________________________

-It's too close to call! Too close!

-I don't believe it!
_________________________________

Lightning!

_________________________________
CUTLASS:
The most spectacular, amazing...
_________________________________
DARRELL: I don't believe it!
_________________________________

unequivocally, unbelievable ending
in the history of the world!
_________________________________

-And we don't know who won!

-Look at that!
_________________________________

(TAPE JITTERING)
_________________________________

(SLOW MOTION DRONE)

_________________________________
MALE 1: That's very close to call.
MALE 2: Can we play that again?
_________________________________

Hey, no cameras! Get outta here!
_________________________________

We're here in Victory Lane,

awaiting the results.
_________________________________

McQueen, that was a risky move,
not taking tires.
_________________________________

Tell me about it!
_________________________________

Are you sorry you didn't have
a crew chief out there?
_________________________________

Oh, Kori. There's a lot more to racing
than just winning.
_________________________________

I mean, taking the race by a full lap...

Where's the entertainment in that?
_________________________________

I wanted to give folks a little sizzle.
_________________________________

-Sizzle?

-Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief?
_________________________________

No, I'm not. 'Cause I'm a one-man show.
_________________________________

What? Oh, yeah, right.
_________________________________

That was a confident

Lightning McQueen.
_________________________________

Live from Victory Lane,

I'm Kori Turbowitz.
_________________________________

-Get outta the shot.

-Yo, Chuck.
_________________________________

Chuck, what are you doing?

You're blockin' the camera!
_________________________________

-Everyone wants to see the bolt.

-What?
_________________________________

-Now, back away.

-That's it! Come on, guys.
_________________________________

-Whoa, team! Where are you going?

-We quit, Mr. One-Man Show!
_________________________________

Oh, okay, leave. Fine.
_________________________________

How will I ever find anyone else

who knows how to fill me up with gas?
_________________________________

(CROWD LAUGHS)
_________________________________

-Adiós, Chuck!

-And my name is not Chuck!
_________________________________

Oh, whatever.
_________________________________

Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen!
_________________________________

Seriously, that was some

pretty darn nice racin' out there.
_________________________________

-By me!

Oh, yeah.
_________________________________

-Zinger!

-Welcome to the Chick era, baby!
_________________________________

The Piston Cup...

It's mine, dude. It's mine.
_________________________________

Hey, fellas, how do you think

I'd look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue!
_________________________________

In your dreams, Thunder.
_________________________________

Yeah, right. Thunder?

What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"?
_________________________________

You know, 'cause thunder

always comes after lightning.
_________________________________

Ka-ping! Ka-pow!
_________________________________

-Who knew about the thunder thing?

-I didn't.
_________________________________

-Give us the bolt!

-That's right.
_________________________________

Right in the lens.
_________________________________

-Show me the bolt, baby!

-Smile, McQueen!
_________________________________

-Show me the bolt, McQueen!

-That's it!
_________________________________

(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
_________________________________

(CROWD CHATTERING)
_________________________________

That was one close finish.

You sure made Dinoco proud.
_________________________________

Thank you, King.
_________________________________

Well, Tex, you've been
good to me all these years.
_________________________________

It's the least I could do.
_________________________________

Whatever happens, you're a winner
to me, you old daddy rabbit.
_________________________________

Thanks, dear.

Wouldn't be nothing without you.
_________________________________

Kch-i-ka-chow!
_________________________________

-I'm Mia.

-I'm Tia.
_________________________________

BOTH: We're, like, your biggest fans!
Ka-chow!
_________________________________

I love being me.

_________________________________
-POLICE: Okay, girls, that's it.
-We love you, Lightning!
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES)
_________________________________

Hey, buddy. You're one gutsy racer.
_________________________________

Oh, hey, Mr. The King.
_________________________________

You got more talent in one lug nut
_________________________________

than a lot of cars has got
in their whole body.
_________________________________

-Really? Oh, that...

-But you're stupid.
_________________________________

-Excuse me?

-This ain't a one-man deal, kid.
_________________________________

You need to wise up and get
a good crew chief and a good team.
_________________________________

You ain't gonna win
unless you got good folks behind you,
_________________________________

(VOICE DWINDLING) and you let them
do their job, like they should.
_________________________________

-Like I tell the boys at the shop...

-A good team.
_________________________________

-Yeah...

-(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
_________________________________

Ka-chow! Ka-pow!
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERING)
_________________________________

(SCREAMING)
_________________________________

(CHEERING)
_________________________________

Oh, Lightning!
_________________________________

If you figure that out

you just gonna be okay.
_________________________________

Oh, yeah, that...

That is spectacular advice.
_________________________________

Thank you, Mr. The King.

_________________________________
-(FANFARE)
-CUTLASS: Ladies and gentlemen,
_________________________________

for the first time in Piston Cup history...
_________________________________

(REVVING) A rookie
has won the Piston Cup.
_________________________________

Yes!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: ...we have a three-way tie.
_________________________________

-(CROWD CHEERS)
-(CAMERAS FLASH)
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Hey,
that must be really embarrassing.
_________________________________

But I wouldn't worry about it.

Because I didn't do it!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Piston Cup officials
have determined that a tiebreaker race
_________________________________

between the three leaders

will be held in California in one week.
_________________________________

Well, thank you! Thanks to
all of you out there! Thank you!
_________________________________

(WHISPERING) Hey, first one to

California gets Dinoco all to himself.
_________________________________

No, not me!
No, you rock, and you know that!
_________________________________

Oh, yeah! Whoo!

_________________________________
MALE: Yep! All right! Got it!
_________________________________

"First one to California

gets Dinoco all to himself."
_________________________________

Oh, we'll see who gets there first, Chick.
_________________________________

Huh?
_________________________________

-Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie.

-I don't want to talk about it.
_________________________________

Let's go, Mack. Saddle up.

What'd you do with my trailer?
_________________________________

-I parked it at your sponsor's tent.

-What?
_________________________________

Gotta make your personal appearance.
_________________________________

No. No! No, no, no, no!
_________________________________

Yes, yes, yes! Lightning McQueen here.
_________________________________

And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper
Ointment, new rear end formula!
_________________________________

Nothing soothes a rusty bumper
like Rust-eze.
_________________________________

Wow! Look at that shine!
_________________________________

Use Rust-eze and you too
can look like me!
_________________________________

Ka-chow!
_________________________________

(BOTH LAUGHING)
_________________________________

I met this car from Swampscott.
_________________________________

He was so rusty
he didn't even cast a shadow.
_________________________________

-You could see his dirty undercarriage.

-(CROWD LAUGHS)
_________________________________

(GROANING) I hate rusty cars.

This is not good for my image.
_________________________________

They did give you your big break.

Besides, it's in your contract.
_________________________________

Oh, will you stop, please?

Just go get hooked up.
_________________________________

-Winter is a grand old time.

-Of this there are no ifs or buts.

_________________________________
DUSTY: But remember,
all that salt and grime...
_________________________________

Can rust your bolts and freeze your...
_________________________________

Hey, look! There he is!
_________________________________

Our almost champ!
_________________________________

DUSTY: Get your rear end in here.

_________________________________

MALE 2: Lightning McQueen,
you are wicked fast!
_________________________________

-That race was a pisser!

-You were booking!

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: Give me a little room.
-You're my hero!
_________________________________

Yes, I know. (CHUCKLES)
_________________________________

"Fred." Fred, thank you.
_________________________________

He knows my name.

He knows my name!
_________________________________

Looking good, Freddie!
_________________________________

Thanks to you, Lightning,

we had a banner year!
_________________________________

We might clear enough

to buy you some headlights.
_________________________________

You saying he doesn't have headlights?
_________________________________

That's what I'm telling ya.

They're stickers!
_________________________________

Well, you know,

racecars don't need headlights,
_________________________________

because the track is always lit.
_________________________________

Yeah, well, so is my brother,
but he still needs headlights.
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(FORCED LAUGHTER)
_________________________________

-Ladies and gentlemen...

-BOTH: Lightning McQueen!

_________________________________
(CRICKETS CHIRPING)

_________________________________
MALE: Free Bird!
_________________________________

You know, the Rust-eze Medicated
Bumper Ointment team
_________________________________

ran a great race today.
_________________________________

And remember, with a little Rust-eze...
_________________________________

(WHISPERING) And an insane
amount of luck,
_________________________________

...you too, can look like me. Ka-chow.
_________________________________

-Hey, kid.

-We love ya.
_________________________________

And we're looking forward

to another great year.
_________________________________

Just like this year!
_________________________________

Not on your life.
_________________________________

-Don't drive like my brother!

-Yeah, don't drive like my brother!
_________________________________

California, here we come!

_________________________________
Dinoco, here we come!
_________________________________

(LIFE IS A HIGHWAY PLAYING)
_________________________________
(BIRDS CHIRPING)
_________________________________

(PHONE RINGING)
_________________________________

(MOANING) Oh... Oh...
Uh, I needed this. Hello?

_________________________________
HARV: Is this Lightning McQueen,
the world's fastest racing machine?
_________________________________

Is this Harv, the world's greatest agent?

_________________________________
HARV: And it is such an honor
to be your agent
_________________________________

that it almost hurts me to take

10% of your winnings.

_________________________________
Merchandising.

And ancillary rights in perpetuity.

_________________________________
Anyway, what a race, champ!

_________________________________
I didn't see it,
but I heard you were great.

_________________________________
Thanks, Harv.

_________________________________
HARV: Listen, they're giving you 20
tickets for the tiebreaker thing in Cali.
_________________________________

I'll pass 'em on to your friends.

Shoot me the names.

_________________________________
-You let Harv rock it for you, baby.

-Right. Friends.
_________________________________

Yes, there's...

_________________________________
HARV: Okay, I get it, Mr. Popular.
_________________________________
So many you can't even narrow it down.

Hey, when you get to town,
_________________________________
you better make time
for your best friend!

_________________________________
Break bread

with your mischpoche here!
_________________________________

That'd be great! We should totally...

_________________________________
HARV: Okay, I gotta jump, kid.
Let me know how it goes. I'm out.
_________________________________

-(DIAL TONE HUMS)

-(SIGHING)
_________________________________

-(MELODIC BEEPING)

-(WHEELS SQUEAKING)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: What? A minivan?

_________________________________

Come on, you're in the slow lane.

_________________________________
This is Lightning McQueen

you're hauling here.

_________________________________
Just stopping off

for a quick breather, kid.
_________________________________

-Old Mack needs a rest.
-Absolutely not.

_________________________________
We're driving all night till we
get to California. We agreed to it.

_________________________________
All night? May I remind you

federal DOT regs state...
_________________________________

Come on, I need to get there

before Chick and hang with Dinoco.
_________________________________
MACK: (GROANS)

All those sleeping trucks.
_________________________________

Hey, kid, I don't know if I can make it.

_________________________________
Oh, sure you can, Mack.
_________________________________

Look, it'll be easy. I'll stay up with you.
_________________________________

-All night?

-All night long.

_________________________________
(SNORING)
_________________________________

(ENGINES SLOWING)
_________________________________

(SNORING)
_________________________________
(BLUBBERING)
_________________________________

(GRUNTING)
_________________________________

(SNORING) Uh!
_________________________________

(BLUBBERING)
_________________________________

-(RAP MUSIC PLAYING)

-(ENGINES REVVING)
_________________________________

(SNIFFING) Ah-choo!
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

-Hey, yo, D.J.

-What up?
_________________________________

-We got ourselves a nodder.

-(CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

(SONGBIRD PLAYING)
_________________________________

Pretty music. (SNORING)
_________________________________

Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man.
_________________________________

-Right back at ya!

-Yeah!
_________________________________

-Oops! I missed.

-You going on vacation?
_________________________________

(ALL LAUGH)
_________________________________

(SNORING)
_________________________________

(SNORING)
_________________________________

-(CHUCKLING)

-(SNIFFLING)
_________________________________

-Oh, no, Snotrod...

-He's gonna blow!
_________________________________

Ah... Ah... Ah-choo!
_________________________________

Gesundheit!
_________________________________

One should never drive while drowsy.
_________________________________

-(TIRES SQUEALING)

-(HORNS HONKING)
_________________________________

-(HONKING LOUDLY)

-(SCREAMING)
_________________________________

-Uh! Ah!

-(ALL HONKING)
_________________________________

(BREATHING HEAVILY) Mack!
_________________________________

-(GRUNTING)

-(HORNS HONKING)

_________________________________
Mack!
_________________________________

Mack!
_________________________________

Hey, Mack! Mack!
_________________________________

Mack!
_________________________________

Mack, wait for me! (ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________

(TIRES SQUEALING)
_________________________________

Mack!
_________________________________

(BELL RINGING)
_________________________________

(HORN BELLOWING)
_________________________________

Mack! Mack!
_________________________________

Mack! Mack!
_________________________________

Wait up! (COUGHING) Mack.
_________________________________

Mack! Mack!
_________________________________
You're not Mack.
_________________________________

Mack? I ain't no Mack!

I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake!
_________________________________
PETERBILT:

Turn on your lights, you moron!
_________________________________

Mack... The Interstate!
_________________________________

(TIRES SQUEALING)
_________________________________

-(ENGINE ROARING)

-Huh?
_________________________________

Not in my town, you don't.
_________________________________

(SIREN WAILING)
_________________________________

Oh, no.
_________________________________

-Oh, maybe he can help me!

-(SHERIFF BACKFIRING)
_________________________________

He's shooting at me!

Why is he shooting at me?
_________________________________

(BACKFIRING)
_________________________________

I haven't gone this fast in years.
_________________________________

(GRUNTING) I'm gonna

blow a gasket or somethin'.
_________________________________

Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine!
_________________________________

What in the blue blazes?
_________________________________

Crazy hot-rodder.
_________________________________

(SIREN CONTINUES WAILING)
_________________________________

(MY HEART WOULD KNOW PLAYING)
_________________________________

(BUZZING)
_________________________________

(WATER HOSE TURNING ON)
_________________________________

(SNORING)
_________________________________

I'm telling you, man,

every third blink is slower.
_________________________________

The sixties weren't good to you,
were they?
_________________________________

(CAR BACKFIRES)
_________________________________

(SIRENS BLASTING)
_________________________________

What? That's not the Interstate!
_________________________________

-(SHERIFF BACKFIRES)

-Ah! Oh!
_________________________________

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!
_________________________________

-(SCREAMING)

-(TIRES SCREECHING)

_________________________________
No, no, no, no, no, no!
_________________________________

Ow!
_________________________________

I'm not the only one seeing this, right?
_________________________________

-Incoming!

-Whoa, man.

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: No!
-Hey!
_________________________________

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
_________________________________

My tires!
_________________________________

-(GRUNTING)

-(GASPING)
_________________________________

-(SCREAMING)

-(GASPING)
_________________________________

-(TIRES SQUEALING)

-(CABLES VIBRATING)

_________________________________
(YELLING)
_________________________________

(SHOUTING)
_________________________________

(McQUEEN SCREAMING)
_________________________________

-(CABLES WHIZZING)

-(STRAINING)
_________________________________

Fly away, Stanley. Be free!

_________________________________
(GASPING)
_________________________________

(SHERIFF BREATHING HEAVILY)
_________________________________

Boy, you're in a heap of trouble.
_________________________________

(SIGHING)
_________________________________

We're live at the Los Angeles
International Speedway
_________________________________

as the first competitor,

Lightning McQueen,
_________________________________

is arriving at the track.

_________________________________
MALE 1: Is it true
he's gonna pose for Cargirl?
_________________________________
MALE 2: What's your strategy?
_________________________________

-(CROWD GASPS)

-(CAMERAS CLICKING)

_________________________________
What? Did I forget

to wipe my mud flaps?
_________________________________

McQueen's driver arrived in California,
but McQueen was missing.

_________________________________
-McQueen was reported missing
-MALE 3: ...to race an unprecedented...
_________________________________
MALE 4: Sponsor stated
they have no idea where he is.
_________________________________

(SPEAKING JAPANESE)
_________________________________

I hope Lightning's okay. I'd hate

to see anything bad happen to him.
_________________________________

I don't know what's harder to find,

McQueen or a chief who'll work with him!
_________________________________

(GERMAN ACCENT) Lightning

McQueen must be found at all costs!
_________________________________

They're all asking the same question,

Where is McQueen?
_________________________________

(GROANING) Oh, boy.
_________________________________

Where am I?
_________________________________

-Mornin', sleepin' beauty!

-Ah!
_________________________________

Boy, I was wonderin'

when you was gonna wake up.
_________________________________

Take whatever you want!

Just don't hurt me!
_________________________________

A parking boot?

Why do I have a parking boot on?

_________________________________
-What's going on here? Please!
-MATER: (CHUCKLING) You're funny.
_________________________________

I like you already. My name's Mater.
_________________________________

Mater?
_________________________________

Yeah, like "tuh-mater,"

but without the "tuh".
_________________________________

-What's your name?

-You don't know my name?

_________________________________
Uh...
_________________________________

No, I know your name.

Is your name Mater too?
_________________________________

What?
_________________________________
Look, I need to get to California
as fast as possible. Where am I?
_________________________________

Where are you? Shoot!
_________________________________

You're in Radiator Springs.
_________________________________

The cutest little town

in Carburetor County.
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Oh, great. Just great!
_________________________________
MATER: Well, if you think that's great,

you should see the rest of the town.
_________________________________

You know,
I'd love to see the rest of the town!
_________________________________

So if you could just open the gate,

take this boot off,
_________________________________

you and me, we go cruisin',

check out the local scene...
_________________________________

-Dad-gum!

-How'd that be, Tuhmater?

_________________________________
-Cool!
-SHERIFF: Mater!
_________________________________

What did I tell you

about talkin' to the accused?
_________________________________

To not to.
_________________________________

Well, quit your yappin' and tow this
delinquent road hazard to traffic court.
_________________________________

Well, we'll talk later, Mater.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) "Later, Mater."

That's funny!
_________________________________

Ah!
_________________________________
SHERIFF: The Radiator Springs

Traffic Court will come to order!
_________________________________

Hey, you scratched my paint!

I oughta take a blowtorch to you, man!
_________________________________

You broke-a the road!
You a very bad car!

_________________________________
FILLMORE: Fascist!
SARGE: Commie!
_________________________________

Officer, talk to me, babe.

How long is this gonna take?
_________________________________

I gotta get to California, pronto.
_________________________________

Where's your lawyer?
_________________________________

(SCOFFS) I don't know. Tahiti maybe.

He's got a timeshare there.
_________________________________

When a defendant has no lawyer,

the court will assign one to him. Hey!
_________________________________
Anyone want to be his lawyer?
_________________________________

Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff!
_________________________________

All rise!
The Honorable Doc Hudson presiding.
_________________________________

Show-off.
_________________________________

-May Doc have mercy on your soul.
-(DOOR BANGING)

_________________________________
-(GASPING)
-HUDSON: All right,
_________________________________

I wanna know who's responsible
for wreckin' my town, Sheriff.
_________________________________

I want his hood on a platter!
_________________________________

I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots!
No, check that.
_________________________________

I'm gonna put him in jail

till the jail rots on top of him,
_________________________________

and then I'm gonna move him
to a new jail and let that jail rot.
_________________________________
I'm...
_________________________________

Throw him out of here, Sheriff.
_________________________________

I want him out of my courtroom.

I want him out of our town!
_________________________________

-Case dismissed.
-Yes!
_________________________________

Boy, I'm purty good

at this lawyerin' stuff.
_________________________________

Sorry I'm late, Your Honor!
_________________________________

Holy Porsche!
She's gotta be from my attorney's office.
_________________________________

Hey, thanks for comin', but we're all set.
_________________________________

He's letting me go.
_________________________________
He's letting you go?
_________________________________

Yeah, your job's pretty easy today.
_________________________________

All you have to do now is stand there
and let me look at you.
_________________________________

Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase.

Me, you, dinner. Pi-cha-kow!

_________________________________
-What the? Ow! Oh!
-McQUEEN: Ka-chow!
_________________________________

Please! (SIGHS)
_________________________________
I know. I get that reaction a lot.
_________________________________

I create feelings in others that

they themselves don't understand.
_________________________________

-(REVVING)
-Agh! Ow!
_________________________________

Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you?
_________________________________

A little bit, but I'll be all right.
_________________________________

Okay. I'm gonna go talk to the judge.
_________________________________

Do what you gotta do, baby.

But listen. Be careful.
_________________________________

Folks around here are not firing on
all cylinders, if you know what I mean.
_________________________________

Ka-ching!
_________________________________

Ah!
_________________________________

I'll keep that in mind.
_________________________________

-Hey there, Mater.
-Howdy, Sally.
_________________________________

-Hi, folks!
-ALL: Good morning!
_________________________________

You know her?
_________________________________

She's the town attorney and my fiancée.
_________________________________

What?
_________________________________

Nah, I'm just kiddin'.

She just likes me for my body.
_________________________________

You look great. You do something
different with your side view mirrors?
_________________________________

What do you want, Sally?
_________________________________

(SIGHING) Come on, make this guy
fix the road. The town needs this.
_________________________________

No. I know his type. Racecar.
_________________________________
That's the last thing this town needs.
_________________________________

Okay, I didn't want to have to do this,
Doc, but you leave me no choice.
_________________________________

Fellow citizens, you're all aware

of our town's proud history.
_________________________________

Here she goes again.
_________________________________

Radiator Springs, the glorious jewel
_________________________________

strung on the necklace

of Route 66, the mother road!
_________________________________

It is our job and our pleasure

to take care of the travelers
_________________________________

on our stretch of that road.
_________________________________
Travelers? What travelers?
_________________________________

Ignore him.
_________________________________

But how, I ask you,

are we to care for those travelers
_________________________________

if there is no road for them to drive on?
_________________________________

-Luigi, what do you have at your store?

-Tires.
_________________________________

And if no one can get to you?
_________________________________

I won't sell any tires.

I will lose everything!
_________________________________

-Flo, what do you have at your store?

-I have gas.
_________________________________
-Lotsa gas!

-Okay, boys, stay with me.
_________________________________

And, Flo, what'll happen if no one
can come to your station to buy gas?
_________________________________

I'll go outta business and

we'll have to leave town.
_________________________________

What's gonna happen if Flo

leaves town and closes her station?
_________________________________

-ALL: Without gas, we're done for!
-What?
_________________________________

Don't you think the car responsible
should fix our road?
_________________________________

The only guy strong enough

to fix that road is Big Al!
_________________________________

Lizzie, Big Al left like, 15 years ago.
_________________________________

Then why are you bringing

him up, you lemon?
_________________________________

Oh, he can do it.
He's got the horsepower.
_________________________________

So, what do you want him to do?
_________________________________

ALL: Fix the road!
_________________________________

-Because we are a town worth fixing!
-Yeah!
_________________________________

(ALL CHEER)
_________________________________

(HONKING) Order in the court!
_________________________________

Seems like my mind

has been changed for me.
_________________________________

-ALL: Yeah!
-No!
_________________________________
FILLMORE: Nice ruling.

_________________________________

Oh, I am so not taking you to dinner.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) That's okay, Stickers.
You can take Bessie.
_________________________________

Man, you get to work with Bessie!
_________________________________

I'd give my left two lug nuts

for somethin' like that.
_________________________________

Bessie? Who's Bessie?
_________________________________

(GURGLING)
_________________________________

This here is Bessie,

finest road-pavin' machine ever built.
_________________________________

I'm hereby sentencing you

to community service.
_________________________________

You're gonna fix the road

under my supervision.
_________________________________

What? This place is crazy!
_________________________________

I know this may be a bad time right now,
_________________________________

but you owe me $32,000 in legal fees.
_________________________________

What?
_________________________________

We're gonna hitch you up to Bessie,

and you're gonna pull her nice.
_________________________________

You gotta be kidding me.
_________________________________

You start there where the road begins.
_________________________________

You finish down there

where the road ends.
_________________________________
MATER: Holy shoot!

_________________________________

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

How long is this gonna take?
_________________________________

Well, fella does it right,

should take him about five days.
_________________________________

Five days?
_________________________________

But I should be in California

schmoozing Dinoco right now!
_________________________________

Then if I were you,

I'd quit yappin' and start workin'!
_________________________________

-Hook him up, Mater.
-Okay-dokey.
_________________________________

(GRUNTING)
_________________________________

(TIRES SQUEALING)
_________________________________

(ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Freedom!
_________________________________

Maybe I should've

hooked him up to Bessie...
_________________________________

And then... Then took the boot off.
_________________________________

Whoo-hoo!
_________________________________

Goodbye, Radiator Springs,

and goodbye, Bessie!
_________________________________

California, here I come! Yeah!
_________________________________

Oh, feel that wind.
_________________________________

Yes!
_________________________________

(SPUTTERING)
_________________________________

No. No, no, no.
_________________________________

No, no, no, no, no. Outta gas?
_________________________________

How can I be outta gas?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Boy, we ain't
as dumb as you think we are.
_________________________________

(STUTTERING) But how did,
how did you...
_________________________________

We siphoned your gas

while you were passed out.
_________________________________

-Ka-chow.

-Ow, ow, ow, ow.
_________________________________

-Gentlemen.

-Sheriff.
_________________________________

Hey, Sheriff.
_________________________________

-Why here?

-Sono sempre stati qui.

_________________________________
-They were better before.

-Stai sempre a parlare.

_________________________________
-Guido!

-Red, can you move over?
_________________________________

I want to get a look at that sexy hot rod.
_________________________________

You know, I used to be
a purty good whistler.
_________________________________

I can't do it now, of course,

on account of sometimes
_________________________________

I get fluid built up in my engine block,
_________________________________

but Doc said he's gonna fix it.

He can fix about anything.
_________________________________

That's why we made him the judge.
_________________________________

Boy, you shoulda heard me on
Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow.
_________________________________

Now, I'm not one to brag
_________________________________

but people come purty far

to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow".
_________________________________

Oh!
_________________________________

-Aw, man, that's just great!
-Hey, what's wrong?
_________________________________

My lucky sticker's all dirty.
_________________________________

Ah, that ain't nothin'. I'll clean it for ya.
_________________________________

(SNORTING)
_________________________________
(HACKING)
_________________________________

No, no, no!
_________________________________

That won't be necessary.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: Hey! Hey, big fella!
Yeah, you in the red!
_________________________________

I could use a little hose down.

Help me wash this off.
_________________________________

Where's he goin'?
_________________________________

Oh, he's a little bit shy, and
he hates you for killin' his flowers.
_________________________________

I shouldn't put up with this.
_________________________________

I'm a precision instrument

of speed and aerodynamics.
_________________________________

-You hurt your what?

-I'm a very famous racecar!

_________________________________
You are a famous racecar?

A real racecar?
_________________________________

Yes, I'm a real racecar.

What do you think? Look at me.
_________________________________

I have followed racing my entire life.
My whole life!
_________________________________

Then you know who I am.

I'm Lightning McQueen.
_________________________________

-Lightning McQueen?

-Yes! Yes!
_________________________________

I must scream it to the world!
_________________________________

My excitement from the top
of someplace very high!
_________________________________

-Do you know many Ferraris?

-No, no, no, no, no.
_________________________________

They race on the European circuit.

I'm in the Piston Cup!

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: What?
-Luigi follow only the Ferraris.
_________________________________

Is that what I think it is?
_________________________________
SALLY: Customers.

_________________________________

Customers!
Customers, everyone! Customers!

_________________________________
-SALLY: Okay!
-Customers?
_________________________________
SALLY: Been a long time.

Remember what we rehearsed.
_________________________________

Make sure your
"Open, please come in" signs are out.
_________________________________

You all know what to do.
All right, nobody panics. Here we go!
_________________________________

Van, I just don't see

any on-ramp anywhere.
_________________________________

-Minny, I know exactly where we are.

-Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere.
_________________________________

-Honey, please.
-SALLY: Hello.
_________________________________

Welcome to Radiator Springs,

gateway to Ornament Valley.
_________________________________

Legendary for its service and hospitality.
_________________________________

How can we help you?
_________________________________

-We don't need anything, thank you.

-Ask for directions to the Interstate.
_________________________________

There's no need to ask for directions.

I know where we're going.
_________________________________

He did the same thing

on our trip to Shakopee.
_________________________________

We were headed over there

for the Crazy Days, and we...
_________________________________

-Okay. Really. We're just peachy, okay?

-What you really need
_________________________________
is the sweet taste

of my homemade, organic fuel.
_________________________________

No, it doesn't agree with my tank.
_________________________________

-Just trying to find the Interstate.

-Good to see you, soldier!
_________________________________

Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut

for your government surplus needs.
_________________________________

-Honey, surplus!

-We have too much surplus.

_________________________________
I do have a map

over at the Cozy Cone Motel.
_________________________________

And if you stay, we offer a free
Lincoln Continental breakfast.
_________________________________

Honey, she's got a map.
_________________________________

I don't need a map! I have the GPS.
_________________________________
Never need a map again, thank you.
_________________________________

How 'bout somethin' to drink?
_________________________________

Stop at Flo's V-Eight Café.

Finest fuel on Route 66.
_________________________________

No we just topped off.
_________________________________

And if you need tires,

stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires,
_________________________________

home of the Leaning Tower of Tires.
_________________________________

-We're trying to find the Interstate.

-But you do need a paint job.

_________________________________
Ramone will paint you up right.

Hey, anything you want!
_________________________________

-You know, like a flame job.

-No thanks...
_________________________________

Maybe ghost flames!
_________________________________

You like old school pinstripin'?

Von Dutch style?
_________________________________

(BOTH GASP)
_________________________________

Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Okay, no.

We're gonna be going now, okay?
_________________________________

Ow!
_________________________________

(LAUGHS) A little somethin'

to remember us by, okay?
_________________________________

-Okay!

-Come back soon, okay?
_________________________________

I mean, you know where we are!

Tell your friends!
_________________________________
VAN: Okay! Yes. You bet.

_________________________________

Thanks again, folks. Bye-bye now.
_________________________________

Psst! Psst! Hey! Hey, hey, hey!
_________________________________

I know how to get to the Interstate!
_________________________________

Do ya?
_________________________________

-Minny, no.

-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
_________________________________

No, not really. But listen.
_________________________________

I'm Lightning McQueen, famous racecar.

I'm being held here against my will.
_________________________________

I need you to call my team,

so they can come rescue me
_________________________________

and get me to California in time for me

to win the Piston Cup. Understand?

_________________________________
-(LOCKS BEEPING)
-McQUEEN: No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
_________________________________

No, it's the truth! I'm telling you!

You gotta help me! Don't leave me here!
_________________________________

I'm in hillbilly hell!

My IQ's dropping by the second!
_________________________________

I'm becoming one of them!
_________________________________

-(McQUEEN ECHOES)

-(SIGHING)
_________________________________

Okay, don't worry.

They know where we are now.
_________________________________

They'll tell friends. You'll see.
_________________________________
MALE DJ: We'll be back
for our Hank Williams marathon...
_________________________________

-That's good.
-...after a Piston Cup update.
_________________________________
KORI: Still no sign
of Lightning McQueen.
_________________________________

Chick arrived in California
_________________________________

and today became the first car

to spend practice time on the track.
_________________________________
HICKS: It's nice to get out here
before the other competitors.
_________________________________

You know, get a head start.

Gives me an edge.

_________________________________
(ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Hoo-hoo-hoo!
_________________________________

Ha-ha!
_________________________________

Yeah!
_________________________________

(CROWD SHOUTING AND CHEERING)
_________________________________

(GIRLS CHATTERING AND GIGGLING)
_________________________________

Hey, McQueen, eat your heart out.
_________________________________

(GASPING) Oh! Let me get this straight.
_________________________________

I can go when this road is done.

That's the deal, right?
_________________________________

-That's what they done did said.

-Okay. Outta my way.
_________________________________

I got a road to finish.
_________________________________

-(GRUNTING)
-(REVVING)
_________________________________

-He's done!
-Done?
_________________________________

-Uh-huh.
-It's only been an hour.
_________________________________

Ah, I'm done. Look, I'm finished.
_________________________________

Say thanks, and I'll be on my way.

That's all you gotta say.
_________________________________
MATER: Whee-hoo!

I'm the first one on the new road!
_________________________________

Oh!
_________________________________

(VIBRATING) It rides purty smooth.
_________________________________

It looks awful!
_________________________________

Well, it matches the rest of the town.
_________________________________

Oh!
_________________________________
-(BLUBBERING)

-Red.
_________________________________

Who do you think you are?
_________________________________

Look, Doc said when I finish, I could go.
That was the deal.
_________________________________

The deal was you fix the road,

not make it worse.
_________________________________

Now, scrape it off! Start over again.
_________________________________

Hey, look, grandpa, I'm not a bulldozer.
I'm a racecar.
_________________________________

Oh-ho-ho-ho!
_________________________________
Is that right? Then why don't we
just have a little race? Me and you.
_________________________________

What?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Me and you. That a joke?
_________________________________

If you win, you go and I fix the road.
_________________________________

If I win, you do the road my way.
_________________________________

Doc, what're you doin'?
_________________________________

I don't mean to be rude here,
_________________________________

but you probably go zero to sixty in,

like, what? Three-point-five years?
_________________________________

Then I reckon
you ain't got nothin' to worry about.
_________________________________

You know what, old-timer?

That's a wonderful idea. Let's race.
_________________________________
SHERIFF: Gentlemen,
this will be a one-lap race.
_________________________________

You will drive to Willy's Butte,

go around Willy's Butte and come back.
_________________________________

There will be no bumpin',

no cheatin', no spittin',
_________________________________

no bitin', no road rage, no maimin',
_________________________________

no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin',

no backstabbin', no road-hoggin',
_________________________________

and no lollygaggin'.
_________________________________

Speed. I'm speed.
_________________________________

Float like a Cadillac, sting like a Beemer.
_________________________________

(LUIGI LAUGHS)
_________________________________

My friend Guido, he dream to give
a real racecar a pit stop.
_________________________________

-Peet stop!
-Uh... (CHUCKLES)
_________________________________

The race is only one lap, guys.
_________________________________

Uno lappo! Don't need any help.
_________________________________

I work solo mio.
_________________________________
Fine. Race your way.
_________________________________

No pit stoppo. Comprendo?
_________________________________
Okay.
_________________________________
SHERIFF: Gentlemen,
_________________________________

start your engines!
_________________________________

(ENGINE SPUTTERS)
_________________________________

(REVVING FURIOUSLY)
_________________________________

-Hijole! Check that out!
-Whoa.
_________________________________

Great idea, Doc.

Now the road will never get done.
_________________________________

Luigi?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) On your mark, get set...
_________________________________

Uno for the money, due for the show,
_________________________________

tre to get ready, and quattro to...
_________________________________

I can't believe it. Go!
_________________________________

(GIGGLING)
_________________________________

(CHEERING)
_________________________________

Huh?
_________________________________

Doc, the flag means go.
_________________________________

Remember the fl... Here we go. Go.
_________________________________

Doc, what are you doing, man?
_________________________________

Oh, dear.
It would seem I'm off to a poor start.
_________________________________

Well, better late than never.

Come on, Mater.
_________________________________

-Might need a little help.
-Uh... Okay.
_________________________________

You got your tow cable?
_________________________________

Well, yeah,
I always got my tow cable. Why?

_________________________________
HUDSON: Oh, just in case.

_________________________________

(YELLING) Ow! Ow! Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
_________________________________

No, no, no, no, no!
_________________________________

-Oh, man!
-Whoa.
_________________________________

-Ow!
-FILLMORE: Bad trip, man.
_________________________________

(REVVING)
_________________________________

Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac
_________________________________

or was that stingin' like a Beemer?
_________________________________

-I'm confused.
-(CHUCKLING)
_________________________________
HUDSON: You drive like you fix roads.

_________________________________

Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater.
_________________________________

(GASPS) Ah!
_________________________________

I'm startin' to think he knowed
you was gonna crash!
_________________________________

Thank you, Mater. Thank you.
_________________________________

I can make a little turn on dirt.
_________________________________

You think?
_________________________________

No. And now I'm a day behind.

I'm never gonna get outta here!
_________________________________

Hey, ése!
You need a new paint job, man!

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: No, thank you.
-How 'bout some organic fuel?
_________________________________
-That freak juice?
-McQUEEN: Pass.
_________________________________

Whoo! Watchin' him
is makin' me thirsty.
_________________________________

Anybody else want somethin' to drink?
_________________________________

Nah, not me, Flo.
_________________________________
I'm on one of them there special diets.
_________________________________

I'm a precisional instrument

of speed and aero-matics.
_________________________________

"You race like you fix roads."
_________________________________

(GRUNTING) I'll show him.
_________________________________

(GRUNTING) I will show him!
_________________________________

-(TAR SPLATTERING)

-Oh, great! I hate it!
_________________________________

-Hate, hate, hate, hate it!

-(CHUCKLES) Music. Sweet music.

_________________________________
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Radiator Springs,
a happy place!
_________________________________

Okay, Bessie, you think that's funny?
_________________________________

Great! I'm talking to Bessie now!

I'm talking to Bessie!
_________________________________
(MATER LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Wow.
_________________________________
MATER: Mornin', Sally!
_________________________________

Hey, look at this here fancy new road

that Lightnin' McQueen done just made!

_________________________________
SALLY: Yes! Uh, amazing!
_________________________________

Whoa! Oh, yeah! (SIGHING)
_________________________________

Oh, Ramone!
Mama ain't seen you that low in years.
_________________________________

I haven't seen a road like this in years.

_________________________________
-Well, then let's cruise, baby.
-RAMONE: Low and slow.
_________________________________

É bellissima! It's beautiful!
_________________________________

Guido, look, it's-a like
it was paved by angels.
_________________________________

Boy, I tell you what.
_________________________________

I bet even the roads on the moon
ain't this smooth.
_________________________________

Doc, look at this!
_________________________________

Shoulda tossed him into

the cactus a lot sooner, huh?
_________________________________

Well, he ain't finished yet.

Still got a long way to go.
_________________________________

Guido, look at Luigi!
_________________________________

This is fantastico!
_________________________________

That looks like fun!
Mater, I got dibs, next turn!
_________________________________

Hey, Luigi, this new road

makes your place look like a dump.
_________________________________

That crazy old devil woman.
_________________________________

(SIGHS) Oh!
_________________________________

She's right!

_________________________________
-SALLY: Ah!
-Guido!
_________________________________

Huh. That punk actually did a good job.
_________________________________

Well, now, where the heck is he?
_________________________________

Sheriff! Is he makin' another run for it?
_________________________________

No, no. He ran outta asphalt

in the middle of the night,
_________________________________

and asked me if he could
come down here.
_________________________________

All he's tryin' to do

is make that there turn.
_________________________________
McQUEEN: No, no, no, no! Oh, great.
_________________________________

Perfect turns on every track

I've ever raced on.
_________________________________

Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself
a quart of oil at Flo's.
_________________________________

I'll keep an eye on him.
_________________________________

Well, thanks, Doc.

I've been feelin' a quart low.
_________________________________

(ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________

(SCREAMING)
_________________________________

(SPITTING)
_________________________________

This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt.
_________________________________

Oh, great. What do you want?

You here to gloat?
_________________________________

You don't have three-wheel brakes,

so you got to pitch it hard,
_________________________________
break it loose and then
just drive it with the throttle.
_________________________________

Give it too much, you'll be

outta the dirt and into the tulips.
_________________________________

So you're a judge,
a doctor and a racing expert.
_________________________________

I'll put it simple.
_________________________________

If you're goin' hard enough left,

you'll find yourself turnin' right.
_________________________________

Oh... Right. That makes perfect sense.

Turn right to go left! Yes! Thank you!
_________________________________

Or should I say, "No, thank you"?
_________________________________

Because in Opposite World,

maybe that really means, "Thank you!"
_________________________________

Crazy grandpa car. What an idiot!
_________________________________

(GROANS)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Turn right to go left.

_________________________________

Hmm...
_________________________________

Whoa!

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: Oh!
-(CAR CRASHING)
_________________________________
-McQUEEN: Ow! Oh, that...
-(CACTUS CRASHING)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: (SCREAMING) Ow!
_________________________________

Turn right to go left.

Guess what? I tried it.
_________________________________

You know what?
This crazy thing happened. I went right!
_________________________________

You keep talkin' to yourself,

people'll think you're crazy.
_________________________________

-Thanks for the tip.

-What? I wasn't talkin' to you!
_________________________________

-Oh, Guido, è bellissimo!

-Che cosa?

_________________________________
-It looks great! This is great!

-Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo.

_________________________________
-(GRUNTS)
-(PASSES GAS)
_________________________________

Oh, Lord.

_________________________________
-(CHUCKLES)
-SHERIFF: Mater!
_________________________________

I need you to watch the prisoner tonight.
_________________________________

Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute.

What if he tries to run again?
_________________________________

Just let him run outta gas

and tow him on back.
_________________________________

-But keep an eye on him.

-Yes, sir!
_________________________________

(GROANING) Oh...
_________________________________

While I'm stuck here

paving this stinkin' road,
_________________________________

Chick's in California

schmoozing Dinoco.
_________________________________

My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Who's touching me?
_________________________________

You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix.
_________________________________

You make-a such a nice new road.
_________________________________

You come to my shop.

Luigi take-a good care of you.
_________________________________

Even though you not a Ferrari.
_________________________________

You buy four tires,

I give you a full-a size spare
_________________________________
-absolutely free!

-Look, I get all my tires for free.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) I like your style, eh?
_________________________________

You drive the hard bargain.
Okay. Luigi make you a new deal.
_________________________________

You buy one tire,

I give you three for free!
_________________________________
FLO: Oh, would you look at that?

_________________________________

Ramone, Ramone!
_________________________________
LUIGI: Then Luigi make you
a new, new deal.
_________________________________
McQUEEN: No, no, no, no.
Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you.
_________________________________

-No, no, no, no. No.

-This is it. My last offer.
_________________________________

You buy one tire, I give you

seven-a snow tires for free!
_________________________________

Done. You interested, you call me.
You know where I am.
_________________________________

(EXHALES DEEPLY)
_________________________________

Ah!
_________________________________

Stop! Let me...
_________________________________

Oh, Red, you missed a spot.

See it right there?

_________________________________
-No! No!
-SALLY: On the hood right there.
_________________________________

Stop, stop! That's cold!
_________________________________

Help! Please! Stop!
_________________________________

(COUGHING)
_________________________________

Thanks, Red.
_________________________________

What was that for?
_________________________________

-Do you wanna stay at the Cozy Cone?

-Huh?
_________________________________

If you do, you gotta be clean.
_________________________________

'Cause even in hillbilly hell

we have standards.
_________________________________

What, I... I don't get it.
_________________________________

I thought I'd say thank you
for doin' a great job.
_________________________________

So I thought I'd let you stay with me.
I mean, not with me!
_________________________________

But there. Not with me there,

but there in your own cozy cone.
_________________________________

-And I'd be in my cone, and it's...

-Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me.
_________________________________

If you want to stay
at the dirty impound, fine.
_________________________________

I understand you criminal types.
_________________________________

No, no, no, no. That's Okay.
_________________________________

Yeah, the Cozy Cone.
_________________________________
SALLY: It's newly refurbished.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: (CHUCKLES) Yeah,
it's like a clever little twist.
_________________________________

The motel's made out of caution cones,

which, of course, cars try to avoid.
_________________________________

But now we're gonna stay in them.
That's funny.
_________________________________

Figure that all out on your own, did you?
_________________________________

Cone number one, if you want.
_________________________________

Oh...
_________________________________

Hey, do I spy a little

pinstriping tattoo back there?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) That's just a... Oh!
_________________________________

(BOTH CHUCKLE)
_________________________________

Oh, you saw that? Yeah.
Just gonna be going.
_________________________________

Gonna... Yeah.
_________________________________

-You know, I knew this girl Doreen.
-(GASPS)
_________________________________

Good-lookin' girl.
_________________________________

Looked just like a Jaguar,

only she was a truck!
_________________________________

You know, I used to crash into her,

just so I could spoke to her.
_________________________________

-What are you talking about?

-I don't know.
_________________________________

Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight,

'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you!
_________________________________

No, Mater, I gotta finish this road,

and I have to get out of here.
_________________________________

Well, that's all right,

Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt.
_________________________________

You probably couldn't handle it anyway.
_________________________________

Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater.
_________________________________

You know who you're talkin' to?

This is Lightning McQueen.
_________________________________

I can handle anything.
_________________________________

(WHISPERING) I'm not doin' this.
_________________________________

Come on. You'll love it! (CHUCKLES)

_________________________________
MATER: Tractor-tippin's fun.
McQUEEN: This is ridiculous.
_________________________________
-(TRACTORS SNORE)
-MATER: All right, listen.
_________________________________

When I say go, we go.

But don't let Frank catch you. Go!
_________________________________

Whoa! Wait! Who's Frank?
_________________________________
McQUEEN: (WHISPERING) Mater!

_________________________________

Wait, Mater!
_________________________________

Okay, here's what you do.
_________________________________

You just sneak up in front of 'em,
and then honk.
_________________________________

And they do the rest. Watch this.
_________________________________

-(HONKING LOUDLY)

-Oh!
_________________________________

Oh... Oh! Oh... (MOOING)
_________________________________

-(GAS SLOSHING)
-(BACKFIRING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING LOUDLY)
_________________________________

I swear, tractors is so dumb!
_________________________________

I tell you what, buddy,

it don't get much better than this.
_________________________________

Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy.
_________________________________

-(HONKING)

-Oh!
_________________________________

Oh! Oh... (MOOING)
_________________________________

-(GAS SLOSHING)
-(BACKFIRING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING) I don't care who you are,
that's funny right there.
_________________________________

Oh, your turn, bud.
_________________________________

Mater, I can't. I don't even have a horn.
_________________________________

-Baby.

-I'm not a baby.
_________________________________

(CLUCKING)
_________________________________

Fine. Stop! Stop, okay?

All right. I'll do something.
_________________________________

(SNORING)
_________________________________

-(REVVING ENGINE)

-Oh!
_________________________________

(ALL EXCLAIMING)
_________________________________
(ALL MOOING)
_________________________________

(ALL GURGLING)
_________________________________

(ALL BACKFIRING)
_________________________________
(BOTH LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(ANGRY MOOING)
_________________________________

(MOOING)
_________________________________

That's Frank.
_________________________________

(BELLOWING ANGRILY)
_________________________________

(SHOUTING)
_________________________________

(MOOING)
_________________________________

(ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________

(MATER LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Run!

_________________________________
-MATER: Here he comes, look out!
-(BELLOWING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING) Whoa!
_________________________________

(MATER SCREAMING)
_________________________________

Run! He's gonna get ya!
_________________________________

(MATER LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Oh! Customers!
_________________________________

Oh!
_________________________________

Ah, no, no, no.
_________________________________

Oof! Oh!
_________________________________
MATER: Tomorrow night we can
go look for the ghostlight!
_________________________________
McQUEEN: I can't wait, Mater.
_________________________________
MATER: Oh, yeah, I'm tellin' ya!
_________________________________

Oh, boy, you gotta admit that was fun!
_________________________________

Oh, yeah... Yeah.
_________________________________

Well, we better get you

back to the impound lot.
_________________________________

You know, actually,
Sally's gonna let me stay at the motel.
_________________________________

Oh...
_________________________________
-Gettin' cozy at the Cone, is we?

-Oh, come... No. No, are you kidding?
_________________________________

Besides, she can't stand me.

And I don't like her, to be honest.
_________________________________

Yeah, you probably right.
_________________________________

Hey, look, there's Miss Sally!
_________________________________

-Where, where?

-(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

-You're in love with Miss Sally.

-No, I'm not.
_________________________________
MATER: Yes, you do.
McQUEEN: No way.
_________________________________
-MATER: Way.
-Come on, look...
_________________________________

(SINGSONG)
You're in love with Miss Sally!

_________________________________
Real mature.
_________________________________

-You're in love!

-Real grown up.
_________________________________

-You love her. You love her.

-Wait...
_________________________________

You love her! You love her. You love her.
_________________________________

All right. Okay. Mater, enough!
_________________________________

-Will you stop that?

-Stop what?
_________________________________

Driving backwards. It's creeping me out.

You're gonna wreck.
_________________________________

Wreck? Shoot!

I'm the world's best backwards driver!
_________________________________

You just watch this right here, lover boy.
_________________________________
(WHOOPING)

_________________________________
McQUEEN: What are you doing?
Watch out! Look out!
_________________________________

Mater? Mater!
_________________________________

-Mater!

-(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Hey, take it easy, Mater!
_________________________________

(SCREAMING HAPPILY)
_________________________________

Oof!
_________________________________

(BLUBBERING) Yee-hee!
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) He's nuts.
_________________________________

No need to watch where I'm goin'.
_________________________________

Just need to know where I've been.
_________________________________

Whoa, that was incredible!

How'd you do that?
_________________________________

Rearview mirrors. We'll get you some,

and I'll teach you if you want.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Yeah,

maybe I'll use it in my big race.
_________________________________

What's so important
about this race of yours, anyway?
_________________________________

It's not just a race.

We're talking about the Piston Cup!
_________________________________

I've been dreaming about it
my whole life!
_________________________________

I'll be the first rookie in history
ever to win it.
_________________________________

And when I do,

we're talkin' big new sponsor,
_________________________________

with private helicopters.
_________________________________

No more medicated bumper ointment.

No more rusty old cars.
_________________________________

What's wrong with rusty old cars?
_________________________________

Well, I don't mean you, Mater.

I mean other old cars. You know?
_________________________________

-Not like you. I like you.

-Nah, it's okay, buddy.
_________________________________

Hey, you think maybe one day I can
get a ride in one of them helicopters?
_________________________________

I mean, I've always wanted to ride

in one of them fancy helicopters.
_________________________________

-Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure.

-You mean it?
_________________________________

Oh, yeah. Anything you say.
_________________________________

I knew it. I knowed I made a good choice!
_________________________________

In what?
_________________________________

My best friend.
_________________________________

See you tomorrow, buddy!
_________________________________

(SINGSONG) McQueen and Sally

parked beneath a tree,
_________________________________

K-I-S-somethin'-somethin'-somethin'-T!
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(REVVING ENGINE)

Whoa, whoa, whoa.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

Number one. Number one...

Ah, number one!
_________________________________

-Ah, this is nice.

-Hey, Stickers.
_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAM)
_________________________________

-I'm sorry.

-You scared me. You gotta be careful.
_________________________________

I scared myself scaring you scaring me.
_________________________________

-I mean, I wasn't like scared scared.

-No, of course not. No.
_________________________________

-I was more...

-I overheard you talkin' to Mater.
_________________________________

When? Just now?

What, what did, what did you hear?
_________________________________

Something about a helicopter ride.
_________________________________

Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got
a kick out of that, didn't he?

_________________________________
-Did you mean it?
-McQUEEN: What?
_________________________________

-That you'll get him a ride.

-Oh, who knows?
_________________________________

First things first. I gotta get outta here
and make the race.
_________________________________

Uh-huh.
_________________________________

You know... Mater trusts you.
_________________________________

Yeah, okay.
_________________________________

-Did you mean that?

-What?
_________________________________

Was it just a "Yeah, okay,"
_________________________________

or (HESITANTLY) "Yeah, okay"
or (STUTTERS) "Yeah, okay?"
_________________________________

Look, I'm exhausted.

It's kinda been a long day.
_________________________________

Yeah, okay. Good night.
_________________________________

(GROANS) Oh...
_________________________________

Hey, thank you.
_________________________________

What did you just say?
_________________________________

You know,

thanks for lettin' me stay here.
_________________________________

It's nice to be out of the impound,

and this is... It's great.
_________________________________

Newly refurbished, right?
_________________________________

Yeah.

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: Good night.
-Good night.
_________________________________

Hmm.
_________________________________

(REVEILLE PLAYING)
_________________________________

(STAR SPANGLED BANNER PLAYING)
_________________________________

Will you turn that disrespectful junk off?
_________________________________

Respect the classics, man. It's Hendrix!
_________________________________

(GROANING)
_________________________________

(BREATHING RAPIDLY)
_________________________________

(MUTTERING)
_________________________________

(FAST-PACED ELECTRONIC
MUSIC PLAYING)
_________________________________

Ah!
_________________________________

-(MOOING LOUDLY)

-(SCREAMING)
_________________________________

No!
_________________________________

(YELLING LOUDLY)
_________________________________

(MOOING)
_________________________________

-No! (GASPING)

-(ALARM BEEPING)
_________________________________

I gotta get outta here!
_________________________________

Hey, have you seen the Sheriff?

Oh! Oh, my gosh.

_________________________________
-Hey, what are you doin'?
-SHERIFF: Get a good peek, city boy?
_________________________________

(STUTTERING) I just need
my daily gas ration from the Sheriff.
_________________________________

Wait for him at Flo's. Get outta here.
_________________________________

I've been trying
to get outta here for three days!

_________________________________
SHERIFF: Hope you enjoyed the show!
_________________________________
(LOUD CLATTERING)
_________________________________

(GROANING)
_________________________________

Whoa, Doc.
_________________________________

Time to clean out the garage, buddy,
come on.

_________________________________

McQUEEN: What?
_________________________________

He has a Piston Cup?
_________________________________

Oh, my gosh.
_________________________________

McQUEEN: Three Piston Cups?
_________________________________

-HUDSON: Sign says stay out.
-(GASPS)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: You have three
Piston Cups. How could you have...
_________________________________

I knew you couldn't drive.

I didn't know you couldn't read.
_________________________________

You're the Hudson Hornet!
_________________________________

Wait at Flo's, like I told ya!
_________________________________

Of course.
I can't believe I didn't see it before.
_________________________________

You're The Fabulous Hudson Hornet!
_________________________________

You used to hold the record for
most wins in a season. Oh, we gotta talk.
_________________________________

You gotta show me your tricks. Please.
_________________________________

I tried that.
_________________________________

You won three times!

Look at those trophies!
_________________________________

You look.
All I see is a bunch of empty cups.
_________________________________

(COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYING)
_________________________________

You know, some automotive yoga

could really lower your RPMs, man.
_________________________________

Oh, take a car wash, hippie.
_________________________________

Yeah, look at my husband, y'all!

Whoo! That's your color!

_________________________________
-RAMONE: Yellow, baby.
-Mmm. You smokin' hot!
_________________________________

There he is.
_________________________________

Oh, my gosh!

Did you know Doc is a famous racecar?
_________________________________
(ALL LAUGHING)
_________________________________

-Doc? Our Doc?

-Not Doc Hudson.
_________________________________

No, no, no, no, it's true!

He's a real racing legend.
_________________________________

He's The Fabulous Hudson Hornet!
_________________________________

Fabulous? I never seen Doc

drive more than 20 miles an hour.
_________________________________

I mean, have you ever seen him race?
_________________________________

No, but I wish I could have.

They say he was amazing!
_________________________________

He won three Piston Cups!
_________________________________

He did what in his cup?
_________________________________

I think the heat's

startin' to get to the boy!
_________________________________

Well, I'll say! Look how red he is.
_________________________________
RAMONE: I think he needs
a new coat of poly, man.
_________________________________
-MATER: Are you sick, buddy?
-You are looking' peaked.
_________________________________

He needs a new coat of poly for sure!
_________________________________

(GAS BELL RINGS)
_________________________________
-SHERIFF: Hey! What are you doin'?
-It's okay. You can trust me, right?
_________________________________

I trust you, all right.

It's him I'm worried about.
_________________________________

Hmm... I trust him.

_________________________________
-SALLY: Come on, let's take a drive.
-A drive?
_________________________________

Yeah, a drive.
_________________________________

Don't you big city racecars

ever just take a drive?
_________________________________

Ah... No. No, we don't.
_________________________________

(GAS PUMP STOPS)
_________________________________

Hey, Stickers! You comin' or what?
_________________________________
FLO: Mmm-hmm!
_________________________________

-And you thought he was gonna run.

-Hey, can you believe it, man?
_________________________________

He actually thought

Doc was a famous racecar!
_________________________________

(LAUGHING) That's so too much!
_________________________________

Okay, you got me out here.

Where are we goin'?
_________________________________

I don't know.
_________________________________

Whoa! Yes.
_________________________________

-(SPUTTERING)

-(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Oh! Ah-ha-ha!
_________________________________

(EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST)
_________________________________

(SALLY CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

-(GRUNTS)

-(LAUGHS)
_________________________________

(SPUTTERING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Oh!
_________________________________

(SPITTING)
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Wow. What is this place?

_________________________________

Wheel Well.
_________________________________

Used to be the most popular stop
on the mother road.
_________________________________

This place?
_________________________________

(HORNS BEEPING)
_________________________________
SALLY: (SIGHING) Yeah, imagine.
_________________________________

Oh, imagine
what it must have been like to stay here.
_________________________________

You know, I don't get you.
_________________________________

How does a Porsche
wind up in a place like this?
_________________________________

Well, it's really pretty simple. I was...
_________________________________

...an attorney in LA
livin' life in the fast lane, and...
_________________________________

Oh, you were, were you? Were you rich?
_________________________________

-What?

-Just clues to the puzzle.
_________________________________

Yeah, okay. Well, that was my life.
_________________________________

And you know what?
_________________________________

It never felt happy.
_________________________________

Yeah. I mean, really?
_________________________________

Yeah. So I left California.
_________________________________

Just drove and drove
and finally broke down right here.
_________________________________

Doc fixed me up, Flo took me in.
_________________________________

Well, they all did. And I never left.
_________________________________

Yeah. You know, I understand.
_________________________________

You need a little R and R.

Recharge the old batteries.
_________________________________

But, you know, after a while,

why didn't you go back?
_________________________________

(INHALING HEAVILY) I fell in love.
_________________________________

-Oh.

-Yep.
_________________________________

-Corvette?

-No.
_________________________________

I fell in love with this.
_________________________________

Whoa. Look at that.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: Look, they're drivin' right by.
_________________________________

They don't even know

what they're missing!
_________________________________
SALLY: Well, it didn't
used to be that way.
_________________________________

Oh, yeah?
_________________________________

Yeah. Forty years ago,
that Interstate down there didn't exist.
_________________________________

Really?
_________________________________
SALLY: Yeah. Back then,

_________________________________

cars came across the country

a whole different way.
_________________________________

How do you mean?
_________________________________

The road didn't cut through the land
like that Interstate.
_________________________________

It moved with the land, you know?

It rose, it fell, it curved.

_________________________________
MALE 1: Mornin'!
MALE 2: Nice day, huh?
_________________________________

Cars didn't drive on it
to make great time.
_________________________________

They drove on it to have a great time.
_________________________________

(OUR TOWN PLAYING)

_________________________________

Well, what happened?
_________________________________

The town got bypassed

just to save 10 minutes of driving.
_________________________________

McQUEEN: How great
would it have been
_________________________________

to see this place in its heyday!
_________________________________

Oh, I can't tell you
how many times I've dreamed of that.
_________________________________

But one of these days
we'll find a way to get it back on the map.
_________________________________

Yeah. Hey, listen, thanks for the drive.
_________________________________

I had a great time.
_________________________________

It's kinda nice to slow down

every once in a while.
_________________________________

You're welcome.
_________________________________
Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you,
_________________________________
we was out smashin' mailboxes, okay?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Wha... What?
_________________________________

(RUMBLING)
_________________________________

(MOOING)
_________________________________

Oh, man, the paint's still wet!
_________________________________

-(HONKING LOUDLY)

-(MOOING)
_________________________________

No, no, no, no! Get out of the store!
_________________________________

Hey! Don't eat the radial!

Here, take-a the snow tires.

_________________________________
SHERIFF: Mater!
MATER: I wasn't tractor-tippin'!
_________________________________

Then where did all these

gol-durn tractors come from?

_________________________________
-MATER: Whoa, boy!
-Hey! Hey, guys!
_________________________________
McQUEEN: There's one goin' this way.
_________________________________

I got it.
_________________________________

Come here, little tractor, come here.
_________________________________

Yeah, that's a good tractor.
_________________________________

No, no, no, no, come here.
_________________________________

What are you doing?
_________________________________

You're not supposed to go

wandering off all...
_________________________________

...alone.
_________________________________

What are you doin'

with those old racin' tires?
_________________________________

(SIGHING HEAVILY)
_________________________________

Come on, Doc, drive.
_________________________________

(REVS ENGINE)
_________________________________

Ah... Yeah.
_________________________________

-Wow.

-Huh?
_________________________________

You're amazing!
_________________________________

(COUGHING) What are you doin'?
_________________________________

Doc, wait!
_________________________________

(TRUCKS MOOING)

_________________________________
MATER: Giddup right in there!
Come on, Rusty.
_________________________________

Doc, hold it!
Seriously, your driving's incredible!
_________________________________

-Wonderful. Now, go away.

-Hey, I mean it. You've still got it!
_________________________________

-I'm askin' you to leave.

-Come on. I'm a racecar,
_________________________________

you're a much older racecar,
_________________________________

but under the hood
you and I are the same.
_________________________________

We are not the same!

Understand? Now, get out.
_________________________________

How could a car like you quit
at the top of your game?
_________________________________

You think I quit?
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Right.

_________________________________

Your big wreck in '54.
_________________________________

They quit on me.
_________________________________

When I finally got put together,

I went back expecting a big welcome.
_________________________________

You know what they said?

"You're history."
_________________________________

Moved right on to
the next rookie standing in line.

_________________________________
There was a lot left in me.
_________________________________

I never got a chance to show 'em.
_________________________________

I keep that to remind me

never to go back.
_________________________________

I just never expected that
that world would...
_________________________________

Would find me here.

_________________________________
-Hey, look, Doc, I'm not them.
-HUDSON: Oh, yeah?
_________________________________

No, I'm not.
_________________________________

When is the last time you cared about

something except yourself, hot rod?
_________________________________

You name me one time
and I will take it all back.
_________________________________

Uh-huh. I didn't think so.
_________________________________

These are good folk around here,

who care about one another.
_________________________________

I don't want 'em depending

on someone they can't count on.
_________________________________

Oh, like you?
You've been here how long
_________________________________
and your friends
don't even know who you are?
_________________________________

Who's caring about only himself?
_________________________________

Just finish that road and get outta here!
_________________________________

(REVEILLE PLAYING)
_________________________________

(STAR SPANGLED BANNER PLAYING)
_________________________________
SARGE: Will you turn that

disrespectful junk off?
_________________________________
FILLMORE: Respect the classics, man.

_________________________________

(SNORING)
_________________________________

(SNORTS)
_________________________________
(PUTTERS)
_________________________________

(GRUNTING)
_________________________________

(SMACKING LIPS) Ah...
_________________________________
MATER: He's done.

_________________________________

He must've finished it
while we was all sleepin'.

_________________________________
Good riddance.
_________________________________

He's gone?
_________________________________

Well, we wouldn't want him

to miss that race of his.
_________________________________

(SNIFFLING)
_________________________________

-Oh, dude, are you crying?

-No! I'm happy!
_________________________________

I don't have to watch him

every second of the day anymore!
_________________________________

I'm glad he's gone!
_________________________________

(SOBBING)
_________________________________

What's wrong with Red?
_________________________________

Oh, he's just sad 'cause you left town
_________________________________

and went to your big race

to win the Piston Cup
_________________________________

that you've always dreamed about
your whole life
_________________________________

and get that big ol' sponsor and that
fancy helicopter you was talkin' about.
_________________________________

(GASPING) Wait a minute!
_________________________________

(ALL LAUGH)
_________________________________

I knowed you wouldn't leave
without saying goodbye.
_________________________________

What are you doin' here?

You're gonna miss your race.
_________________________________

Don't worry. I'll give you
a police escort, and we'll make up time.
_________________________________

Thank you, Sheriff.
_________________________________

But you know I can't go just yet.
_________________________________

Well, why not?
_________________________________

-I'm not sure these tires...
-(LUIGI GASPS EXCITEDLY)

_________________________________
-...can get me to California.
-GUIDO: Peet stop?
_________________________________

Yeah, does anybody know

what time Luigi's opens?
_________________________________

(LAUGHING) I can't-a believe it!
_________________________________
Four new tires!
_________________________________

Grazie, Mr. Lightning. Grazie!

_________________________________
-Would you look at that!
-LUIGI: Our first customer in years!
_________________________________

I am filled with tears of ecstasy,
_________________________________

for this is the most

glorious day of my life!
_________________________________

All right, Luigi, give me
the best set of blackwalls you've got.
_________________________________

No! No, no, no.
_________________________________

You don't-a know what you want.

Luigi know what you want.
_________________________________

Blackwall tires.

They blend into the pavement.
_________________________________

But-a this,
_________________________________

whitewall tires!
_________________________________

They say, "Look at me!

Here I am! Love me."
_________________________________

All right, you're the expert.

_________________________________
-(SCOFFS)
-McQUEEN: Oh, don't forget the spare.
_________________________________

-Perfetto. Guido!

-Peet stop!
_________________________________

(ROUTE 66 PLAYING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING) What did
Luigi tell you, eh?
_________________________________

Wow, you were right.

Better than a Ferrari, huh?
_________________________________

Eh... No.
_________________________________

Wow! This organic fuel is great!

Why haven't I heard about it before?
_________________________________

It's a conspiracy, man!
_________________________________

The oil companies got a grip
on the government!
_________________________________

They're feedin' us a bunch of lies, man.
_________________________________

Okay, I'll take a case.
_________________________________

Ow! Eh!
_________________________________

(McQUEEN YELPS)
_________________________________

-(CHUCKLES)

-(BREATHES IN DEEPLY)
_________________________________
RAMONE: Ah, yeah.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: Ka-chow.
_________________________________
-Here she comes!
-McQUEEN: Places, everybody. Hurry!
_________________________________
-McQUEEN: Act natural.
-(WHISTLING)
_________________________________

-Hi, Sally.

-Buon giorno!

_________________________________
All right, what's goin' on?
_________________________________

Ladies and gentlecars,
_________________________________

please welcome
the new Lightning McQueen!
_________________________________

Pow! What do you think?
_________________________________

Radiator Springs

looks pretty good on me.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) I'll say.
_________________________________

(PURRING) Ka-chow.
_________________________________

You're gonna fit right in in California.
_________________________________

Oh, my goodness. It looks like

you've helped everybody in town.
_________________________________

Yeah, everybody except one.
_________________________________

Hey, is it getting dark out?
_________________________________

What? What'd he say?
_________________________________

Let me say that again.

(YELLING) Is it getting dark out?
_________________________________

Now, what was I
supposed to do after that?
_________________________________

(SH-BOOM PLAYING)
_________________________________

(GASPING) They fixed their neon!
_________________________________

-Low and slow?
-Oh, yeah, baby! (CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

(FLO LAUGHS)
_________________________________
(FLO SHRIEKS)
_________________________________

Just like in its heyday, right?
_________________________________

It's even better than I pictured it.
Thank you.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

Shall we cruise?
_________________________________

Oh, thank you, dear. I'd love to!
_________________________________

-No, no, no.

-Lizzie!
_________________________________

I remember when Stanley
first asked me to take a drive with him.
_________________________________

Hey, Miss Sally. May I have this cruise?

_________________________________
-Of course, Mater.
-SHERIFF: Uh-uh-uh!
_________________________________

(MOOING)
_________________________________
...and again and I said, "No."

He asked me again, and I said, "No."
_________________________________

But, oh, he was a persistent

little bugger for a two-cylinder.
_________________________________

Finally I said, "All right, one little drive."
_________________________________

-Oh!

-(MATER CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

-Hey!

-Thanks, Mater.
_________________________________

Good evenin', you two.
_________________________________

Oh, Stanley, I wish you could see this.
_________________________________

-Is that what I think it is?

-Oh, I don't know, Flo.
_________________________________

I haven't had a chance to find out.

But I am going to find out. Hello.
_________________________________

Not that. That.
_________________________________
SALLY: (GASPS) Customers?

_________________________________

Customers, everybody! And a lot of 'em!
_________________________________

You know what to do.

Just like we rehearsed.
_________________________________

(ALL GASP)
_________________________________

It's the ghost light!
_________________________________

We have found McQueen.

We have found McQueen!
_________________________________

McQueen, over here!
_________________________________

-Wait, excuse me.
-Is it true you've been in rehab?

_________________________________
-Did you have a nervous breakdown?
-McQUEEN: What?
_________________________________
REPORTER 1: McQueen's
wearing whitewalls!
_________________________________
REPORTER 2: Your tires balding?
SALLY: McQueen!
_________________________________
REPORTER 3: Was McQueen
your prisoner?
_________________________________

Shoot, no!
_________________________________

We're best buds!

I ain't braggin' or nothin',
_________________________________

but I was in charge of huntin' him down
if he tried to escape.
_________________________________

Sally! Sally!
_________________________________

Will you still race for the Piston Cup?
_________________________________

-Stickers?
-Sally!

_________________________________
REPORTER 4: Come on,
give us some bolt!
_________________________________
(HORN HONKING)
_________________________________

You're here!

Thank the manufacturer! You're alive!

_________________________________
-Mack?
-MACK: You're here! I can't believe it!
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) You are a sight
for sore headlights!
_________________________________

I'm so sorry I lost you, boss.

I'll make it up to you!
_________________________________

Mack, I, I can't believe you're here.
_________________________________
HARV: Is that the world's
fastest racing machine?
_________________________________

-Is that Harv?
-Yeah. He's in the back.

_________________________________
-REPORTER 1: Show us the bolt!
-Get back, you oil-thirsty parasites!
_________________________________
REPORTER 2: Where's the old
McQueen?
_________________________________

Actually, this is my good side here.

_________________________________
-Harv! Harv!
-REPORTER 3: Give us the bolt!
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Harv?
REPORTER 3: Come on!
_________________________________
HARV: Kid, I'm over here!
_________________________________

How you doin', buddy?

_________________________________
HARV: My star client disappears
off the face of the earth!
_________________________________

-How do you think I'm doing?
-I can explain.
_________________________________

I'm doing great! You're everywhere!

Radio, TV, the papers!
_________________________________

You can't buy this kind of publicity!

What do you need me for?
_________________________________

That's just a figure of speech,

by the way. You signed a contract.

_________________________________
Where are you?
I can't even find you on my GPS.

_________________________________
I'm in this little town

called Radiator Springs.

_________________________________
-You know Route 66? It' still here!
-HARV: Yeah, that's great kid.
_________________________________
Playtime is over, pal.
_________________________________

While the world's been trying to
find you Dinoco has had no one to woo.

_________________________________
-Who are they gonna woo?
-Chick!

_________________________________
HARV: Bingo. In fact, check out
what's on the plasma right now.
_________________________________
-MALE: Show us the thunder!
-You want thunder?
_________________________________

You want thunder?

Ka-chicka, ka-chicka!

_________________________________
-Hey, that's my bit!
-HARV: You've gotta get to Cali, pronto!
_________________________________

Just get out of Radiation Stinks now,

or Dinoco is history, you hear me?

_________________________________
Just give me a second here, Harv.
_________________________________
HARV: No, wait. Where are you goin'?
_________________________________

Get in the trailer, baby. Kid!

You want a bigger trailer?

_________________________________
Sally, I... I want you to...
_________________________________

Look, I wish... (SIGHS)
_________________________________

Thank you. Thanks for everything.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) It was just a road.
_________________________________
No. It was much more than that.
_________________________________

Hey, kid! We gotta go.

Harv's goin' crazy!
_________________________________

He's gonna have me fired
if I don't get you in the truck right now!
_________________________________

-Mack, just hold it for...
-You should go.

_________________________________
-McQUEEN: I know, but...
-Good luck in California.
_________________________________

I hope you find what you're looking for.

_________________________________
-MALE: McQueen, come on!
-Sally...
_________________________________

Sally!
_________________________________
-Show us the bolt, McQueen! The bolt!

Hey, Lightning, show us the bolt!

_________________________________
HARV: Come on, get in the trailer.
MALE: Where's the old McQueen?

_________________________________
HARV: That's it. That's right, let's go!
_________________________________

You're a big shining star.

You're a superstar.

_________________________________
You don't belong there, anyway.
_________________________________

Whoa... Wait... Whoa, whoa, wait, wait!
_________________________________

(ENGINE STARTS)

_________________________________
REPORTER: Hey, guys!
McQueen's leavin' in the truck!
_________________________________

Hey, are you Doc Hudson?
_________________________________

-Yeah.
-Thanks for the call.
_________________________________

You called them?
_________________________________
It's best for everyone, Sally.
_________________________________

Best for everyone or best for you?
_________________________________

I didn't get to say goodbye to him.
_________________________________

(LIGHT BUZZING)
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Hello, race fans. Welcome
to what has become, quite simply,
_________________________________
the biggest event in the history
of racing.
_________________________________

A three-way battle for the Piston Cup!
_________________________________
DARRELL: There's a crowd
of nearly 200,000 cars
_________________________________

here at the Los Angeles

International Speedway.
_________________________________

Tickets to this race are hotter than a
black leather seat on a hot summer day!

_________________________________
CUTLASS: The King, Chick Hicks
and Lightning McQueen
_________________________________

in a 200 lap, winner-takes-all,

tiebreaker race.
_________________________________
I got a lotta miles on me,
but let me tell you somethin'.
_________________________________

I never thought I'd see anything like this.
This is exciting!

_________________________________
CUTLASS: In fact, the country
has almost shut down
_________________________________

to watch what many experts

are calling "the race of the century."
_________________________________

Hey, King! Good luck in your last race.
_________________________________

-You've sure been an inspiration for me.

-Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it.
_________________________________

-Hey, be careful out there, okay?

-Yeah, man.
_________________________________
MIA: He's so hot!

_________________________________
Wanna know the forecast?

I'll give you the forecast.
_________________________________

A 100% chance of thunder!

Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka!
_________________________________

Say it with me! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka!
_________________________________

Hey, you!
No admittance without a garage pass.
_________________________________

Oh, it's okay.

Lightning McQueen knows me!
_________________________________

Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day
for a race, isn't it?
_________________________________

-Absolutely, Mr. Andretti.

-And good morning to you, Fred.

_________________________________
Mario Andretti knows my name!

You gotta let me in now!
_________________________________
GUARD: Sorry, pal.
_________________________________
McQUEEN: Okay, here we go.
Focus. Speed.
_________________________________

I am speed.
_________________________________

(CARS WHIZZING)
_________________________________

Victory. One winner, two losers.
_________________________________

(ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________

Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed...
_________________________________

(BIRDS SINGING)

_________________________________
-(KNOCK ON DOOR)
-MACK: Lightnin'! You ready?
_________________________________

(GASPING) Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm ready.
_________________________________

(ALL CLAMORING)
_________________________________

Mack, thanks for being
my pit crew today.
_________________________________

Don't worry about it, kid.

It's the least I could do.
_________________________________

After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name.
_________________________________

-It is?

-Ah... Not really.
_________________________________

(ALL SHOUTING)
_________________________________

(GULPING)
_________________________________

Uh-oh!
_________________________________

-(CHEERING)

-(GIGGLING)
_________________________________

Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16.
_________________________________
CUTLASS: And there he is,

Lightning McQueen!
_________________________________

Missing all week, and then he turns up
in the middle of nowhere!
_________________________________

In a little town called Radiator Springs.
_________________________________
DARRELL: Wearin' whitewall tires,
of all things.
_________________________________

-Oh!

-Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka!
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING)
_________________________________

Hey, where you been?

I've been kinda lonely.
_________________________________

Nobody to hang out with.

I mean, except the Dinoco folks.
_________________________________

And the twins. Of course.

The ones that used to be your fans,
_________________________________

but now they're my fans.

Listen to what the twins think...
_________________________________

Agh! Shoot!
_________________________________
DARRELL: Boogity, boogity, boogity,
boys! Let's go racin'!
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERING)
_________________________________

Come on, you can do it!
_________________________________

Come on, King, make us proud, boy!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Fifty laps down, and
The King is still holding a slim lead.
_________________________________
DARRELL: McQueen's got a run
on him! He's lookin' to the inside!
_________________________________

Oh! Chick slammed the door on him!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Chick's not

making it easy on him today.
_________________________________
DARRELL: He lost momentum,

_________________________________

and now he's gonna have to
chase him back down!
_________________________________

-(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

-(BIRDS SINGING)
_________________________________

(BRAKES SQUEALING)
_________________________________
CUTLASS: McQueen spins out
in the infield!

_________________________________

(ALL GASP)
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Just me
and the old man, fellas.
_________________________________

-McQueen just doesn't have it today.

-(ALL LAUGH)

_________________________________
-(GROANS)
-MACK: Hey, kid,
_________________________________

-are you all right?

-I don't know, Mack.

_________________________________
I don't think I...
_________________________________
HUDSON: I didn't come all this way
to see you quit.
_________________________________
-McQUEEN: Doc?
-(ALL CHEERING)
_________________________________

Guys, you're here! I can't believe this!
_________________________________

I knew you needed a crew chief,

but I didn't know it was this bad.
_________________________________

You said you'd never come back.
_________________________________

Well, I really didn't have a choice.

Mater didn't get to say goodbye.
_________________________________

Goodbye! Okay, I'm good.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES)
_________________________________

All right, if you can drive as good
as you can fix a road
_________________________________

then you can win this race

with your eyes shut.
_________________________________

Now, get back out there!
_________________________________

Hot snot, we are back in business!

Guido! Luigi!
_________________________________

You're goin' up
against professional pit crews.
_________________________________

-You're gonna have to be fast.

-They will not know what bit them!

_________________________________
Kid, you can beat these guys.
_________________________________

Find a groove that works for you
and get that lap back.

_________________________________
(MURMURING)
_________________________________

-Is it?

-Oh, wow. That's him!
_________________________________

Is that... That's the Hudson Hornet!

The Hudson Hornet's back!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: It appears McQueen

has got himself a pit crew.
_________________________________

And look who he has for a crew chief!
_________________________________

-Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet!

-Whoa!
_________________________________

Well, dip me in axle grease

and call me Slick! It surely is.
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERING)
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Wow,
this is history in the making.

_________________________________

Nobody has seen the racing legend
in over 50 years!

_________________________________
Hey, Doc!
_________________________________

Come look at this fellow on the radio.
He looks just like you.
_________________________________
CUTLASS:
McQueen passes on the inside!
_________________________________
DARRELL: He's nearly a lap down.
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Can he catch up to them
with only 60 laps to go?
_________________________________

You're goin' great, kid.

Just keep your head on.
_________________________________

Vai! Vai, vai!
_________________________________

Hey, shrimpie,
where did McQueen find you, huh?
_________________________________

Those round things are called tires,

and they go under the car!
_________________________________

(ALL LAUGH)
_________________________________

Con chi credi di parlare?

Ma, con chi stai parlando?
_________________________________

No! No, no! You'll have your chance.
You will have your chance.
_________________________________

Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh?
_________________________________

What do you think of this?
_________________________________

-(TIRES SQUEALING)

-Yeah, that's it, kid.
_________________________________

What?
_________________________________

Whoa! Git-R-done!
_________________________________

(LAUGHING) I taught him that. Ka-chow!

_________________________________
-Ah!
-CUTLASS: What a move by McQueen!
_________________________________

He's caught up to the leaders.
_________________________________

Yeah. This is what it's all about.
_________________________________

A three-way battle for the lead,

with ten to go!
_________________________________

(CHORTLING)

Look at that boy go out there!
_________________________________
HICKS: Oh! (GRUNTING)

_________________________________

No, you don't.
_________________________________

(TIRE BLOWS)
_________________________________

Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat!
_________________________________

-Can you get back to the pits?

-Yeah, yeah. I think so.

_________________________________
Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in.

Don't tear yourself up, kid.
_________________________________
MACK: We gotta get him

back out there fast
_________________________________

or we're gonna be a lap down,

and we'll never win this race!
_________________________________

Guido! It's time.
_________________________________

Hey, tiny,
you gonna clean his windshield?
_________________________________

(AIR WRENCH WHIRRING)
_________________________________
DARRELL: I don't believe it!

_________________________________
CUTLASS: That was
the fastest pit stop I've ever seen!
_________________________________
DARRELL: It was a great stop,

but he's still gotta beat that pace car!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: It's gonna be close.

_________________________________

-Yeah, baby!

-(ALL HOLLERING)
_________________________________
DARRELL: He's back in!
_________________________________

Peet stop.
_________________________________

-Guido, you did it!

-Way to go, Guido!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: This is it. We're heading
into the final lap
_________________________________

and McQueen is right behind
the leaders. What a comeback!
_________________________________

A hundred and ninety-nine laps!

It all comes down to this!
_________________________________

This is it, kiddo.
_________________________________

You've got four turns left. One at a time.

_________________________________
Drive it in deep and hope it sticks.

_________________________________
-Go!

-(REVVING)
_________________________________

We'll see about that!
_________________________________
CUTLASS: McQueen's going inside!

_________________________________
-Chick and King are loose!
-DARRELL: I think McQueen's out!
_________________________________
DARRELL: McQueen saved it!
CUTLASS: He's back on the track!
_________________________________

-Float like a Cadillac...

-Sting like a Beemer!
_________________________________

-Ka-chow! Ka-chow! Ka...

-(ALL CHEERING)
_________________________________
DARRELL: Lightning McQueen

is gonna win the Piston Cup!
_________________________________

Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers!
_________________________________

(GRUNTS) I am not comin' in
behind you again, old man.
_________________________________

-Oh, no!

-(CROWD GASPS)
_________________________________

(BRAKES SCREECHING)
_________________________________

(ENGINE IDLING)
_________________________________

Yeah! Whoo-hoo!
_________________________________

I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah!
_________________________________
FLO: What's he up to, Doc?

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)
_________________________________

What are you doin', kid?
_________________________________

I think The King

should finish his last race.
_________________________________

You just gave up the Piston Cup,

you know that?
_________________________________

This grumpy old racecar I know
once told me somethin'.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: It's just an empty cup.
_________________________________
CUTLASS: Darrell, is pushing
on the last lap legal?
_________________________________

He's not really pushin' him.

He's just givin' him a little bump draft.
_________________________________

Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
_________________________________

Hey. What? What's goin' on?
_________________________________

-That's what I call racin'.
-(SOBBING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERS WILDLY)
_________________________________

-Bravo il mio amico!

-Way to go, buddy!
_________________________________

There's a lotta love out there,

you know, man?
_________________________________

Don't embarrass me, Fillmore.
_________________________________

That's my hot rod.
_________________________________

Come on, baby, bring it out!

Bring out the Piston Cup!
_________________________________

Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka!
_________________________________

Yeah! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about!
_________________________________

Hey, how come the only one celebrating
is me, huh?
_________________________________

Where are the girls?

Bring on the confetti!
_________________________________

Ow! Ow! Easy with the confetti.
What's goin' on?
_________________________________

Come on, snap some pictures.

I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco!
_________________________________

Say it with me. Ka-chicka!
_________________________________

(ALL BOOING)
_________________________________

What's wrong with everybody?

Where's the happiness?
_________________________________

Hey! This is the start of the Chick era!
_________________________________

-Thanks, Lightnin'.

-You're welcome.
_________________________________

-Way to go, King!

-You're still the car!
_________________________________

You're The King! Yeah!
_________________________________

(CROWD CHEERING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHING AND CHEERING)
_________________________________

-You made us proud, kid!

-Congrats on the loss, me bucko!

_________________________________
You got a lotta stuff, kid.
_________________________________

Thanks, Doc.
_________________________________

Hey, Lightnin'.
_________________________________

How 'bout comin' over here

and talk to me a minute?
_________________________________

Son, that was some real racin' out there.
_________________________________

How'd you like to become

the new face of Dinoco?
_________________________________

But I didn't win.
_________________________________

Lightnin', there's a whole lot
more to racin' than just winnin'.

_________________________________
DUSTY: He was so rusty,

when he drove down the street,
_________________________________

-buzzards used to circle the car!

-(ALL LAUGHING)
_________________________________

Thank you, Mr. Tex, but...
_________________________________

But these Rust-eze guys over there
gave me my big break.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: I'm gonna stick with them.
_________________________________

Well, I sure can respect that.
_________________________________

Still, you know, if there's ever anything

I can do for you, just let me know.
_________________________________

I sure appreciate that. Thank you.
_________________________________

Actually, there is one thing.
_________________________________
(WHOOPING)
_________________________________

Hey, look at me! I'm flyin', by golly!
_________________________________

I'm happier than a tornado
in a trailer park!

_________________________________
LUIGI: I think it's about-a
time we redecorate.
_________________________________
SCHUMACHER: Ciao.
_________________________________

Hi. Lightning McQueen told me

this was the best place in the world
_________________________________
to get tires.
_________________________________

How 'bout setting me and my friends up

with three or four sets each?
_________________________________

Guido! There is a real

Michael Schumacher Ferrari in my store.
_________________________________

A real Ferrari!
_________________________________

Punch me, Guido. Punch me in the face.
_________________________________

This is the most glorious day of my life.
_________________________________

Wow. Spero che
il tuo amico si riprenda.
_________________________________

Mi dicono che siete fantastici.

_________________________________
-(SIGHING)

-(ENGINE REVVING)
_________________________________

(BOTH CHUCKLE)
_________________________________

Just passin' through?
_________________________________

Actually, I thought

I'd stop and stay awhile.
_________________________________

-I hear this place is back on the map.

-It is?
_________________________________

There's some rumor floating around

that some hotshot Piston Cup racecar
_________________________________

is setting up his
big racing headquarters here.
_________________________________

Really? Ah, well, there goes the town.
_________________________________

You know, I really missed you, Sally.
_________________________________

Well, I create feelings in others

they themselves don't understand and,
_________________________________

-blah, blah, blah.

-(McQUEEN CHUCKLES)

_________________________________
McQueen and Sally

parked beneath the tree,
_________________________________

K-I-S-S... Uh... I-N-T!
_________________________________

Great timing, Mater!
_________________________________

Hep-non, hip-hep, hi-li-lilly! Whee!
_________________________________

He's my best friend.

What're you gonna do?
_________________________________

So, Stickers, last one to Flo's buys?
_________________________________

I don't know.

Why don't we just take a drive?
_________________________________

Hmm... Nah.
_________________________________

Yeah! Ka-chow!
_________________________________

(FAST-PACED MUSIC PLAYING)
_________________________________

(YELLING)
_________________________________
(INAUDIBLE)
_________________________________

(SIRENS BLARING)
_________________________________

(SNIFFING) Ah-choo!
_________________________________
MATER: All right, everybody,

please keep together now.
_________________________________

We is now entering the Doc Hudson
wing of the museum.
_________________________________

Wow. Unbelievable.

That many wins in a single season.
_________________________________

He's the real deal, Junior.

The Hudson Hornet was my inspiration.
_________________________________

Excuse me, son.

Is Doc Hudson here today?
_________________________________

Sorry, Mrs. The King, I think Doc
went out for a drive or somethin'.

_________________________________
McQUEEN: Whoo! Whoo!
HUDSON: Yeah!
_________________________________

Well, you sure ain't no dirt boy.
_________________________________

Not today, old man.

I know all your tricks.
_________________________________

(GROWLS)
_________________________________

Doc! Doc!
_________________________________

Whoo-ah!
_________________________________
HUDSON: Not all my tricks, rookie!
_________________________________

(ALL GRUMBLE)
_________________________________

(CHEERING)
_________________________________

Attention! Kiss the pavement goodbye.
_________________________________

When I'm finished, you'll have mud

in places you didn't know you had!
_________________________________

-Yo, I've never been off-road!

-Well, that's gonna change right now!
_________________________________

About face! Drop and give me 20 miles!
_________________________________

Go! Go! Go, go, go, go, go! Go!
_________________________________

Man, now I got dirt in my rims!
_________________________________

-(METAL CLANKS)

-Huh? Look at this!
_________________________________

It's my hood! It's my hood!
_________________________________

I ain't seen this thing in 20 years!
_________________________________

(IN NASAL VOICE) Well, it fits perfectly.

How do I look? Ah-choo!
_________________________________

Oh, dang.
_________________________________

You are a toy car!

_________________________________
You are a sad, strange little wagon

and you have my pity. Farewell.
_________________________________
WOODY CAR: Oh, yeah?
Well, good riddance, you loony!
_________________________________

Hey, I hate to break up the road rally,
guys, but they're here!

_________________________________
Birthday guests at three o'clock!
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Oh, man! Whoever does
the voice of that piggy truck,
_________________________________

I'm tellin' ya, he's one great actor!
_________________________________

We're banished, genius! Stuck here
in this wasteland without chains!

_________________________________
Mike, the Boomobile's in trouble!
She needs our help!

_________________________________
-You're still not listening! (GASPING)
-Ah!
_________________________________

Welcome to the Himalayas!
Snow cone?
_________________________________

Oh, that Abominable Snowplow

is quite the comic thespian!
_________________________________
MALE: Just get in there. Go! Go, go, go!

_________________________________
Circus cars?

_________________________________
How can you be circus cars?

_________________________________
These are the lousiest

circus cars in the world,

_________________________________
and they're gonna make me rich!

_________________________________
Wait a minute here.
_________________________________

They're just usin' the same actor
over and over.
_________________________________

What kind of a cut-rate production
is this?
_________________________________

(SLOW SONG PLAYING)
_________________________________

(MINNY MOANING)
_________________________________

Oh, for the love of Chrysler, can we
please ask someone for directions?
_________________________________

No! There's an on-ramp close!

I know it! I can feel it!
_________________________________

(LAUGHING)
_________________________________

_________________________________
MILO: Good afternoon, gentlemen.

_________________________________

First off, I'd like to thank this board

_________________________________

for taking the time to hear my proposal.

_________________________________

Now, we've all heard

of the legend of Atlantis,

_________________________________

a continent somewhere

in the mid-Atlantic

_________________________________

that was home

to an advanced civilization,

_________________________________

possessing technology

far beyond our own,

_________________________________

that, according to our friend Plato here,

_________________________________

was suddenly struck

by some cataclysmic event

_________________________________

that sank it beneath the sea.

_________________________________

Now, some of you may ask,

why Atlantis?

_________________________________

It's just a myth, isn't it?

_________________________________

Pure fantasy.

_________________________________

Well, that is where you'd be wrong.

_________________________________

10,000 years

before the Egyptians built the pyramids,

_________________________________

Atlantis had electricity,

advanced medicine,

_________________________________

even the power of flight.

Impossible, you say?

_________________________________

Well, no. No, not for them.

_________________________________

Numerous ancient cultures

all over the globe agree

_________________________________

that Atlantis possessed

a power source of some kind

_________________________________

more powerful than steam, than coal.

_________________________________

More powerful than our modern

internal combustion engines.

_________________________________

Gentleman, I propose

that we find Atlantis,

_________________________________

find that power source,

_________________________________

and bring it back to the surface.

_________________________________

Now, this is a page

from an illuminated text

_________________________________

that describes a book called

The Shepherd's Journal,

_________________________________

said to have been

a first hand account of Atlantis

_________________________________

and its exact whereabouts.

_________________________________

Now, based on a centuries-old

translation of a Norse text,

_________________________________

historians have believed

the Journal resides in Ireland.

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

But after comparing the text

_________________________________

to the runes on this Viking shield,

_________________________________

I found that one of the letters

had been mistranslated.

_________________________________

So, by changing this letter

_________________________________

and inserting the correct one,

_________________________________

we find that The Shepherd's Journal,

the key to Atlantis,

_________________________________

lies not in Ireland, gentlemen,

_________________________________

but in Iceland.

_________________________________

Pause for effect.

_________________________________

Gentlemen... Ah!

I'll take your questions now.

_________________________________

(PHONE RINGING)

_________________________________

Would you gentlemen

please excuse me for a moment?

_________________________________

Cartography and Linguistics,

Milo Thatch speaking.

_________________________________

(INDISTINCT RANTING)

_________________________________

Yeah. Yeah, just a second.

_________________________________

Pardon me, Mr. Hickenbottom.

_________________________________

(CREAKING)

_________________________________

(RUMBLING)

_________________________________

(CLANKING)

_________________________________

How's that? Is that better?

_________________________________

Yeah. You're welcome.

_________________________________

-And don't let it happen again.

-All right, bye.

_________________________________

Now, as you can see by the...

_________________________________

By this, um, map...

_________________________________

Map that...

_________________________________

(CLEARS THROAT)

That I've drawn, I plotted the route

_________________________________

that will take myself and a crew

_________________________________

to the southern coast of Iceland

to retrieve the Journal.

_________________________________

(CLOCK CHIMING)

_________________________________

Ah, showtime.

_________________________________

Well, this is it.

_________________________________

I am finally getting out of the dungeon.

_________________________________

(FILM ROLLING)

_________________________________

"Dear Mr. Thatch, this is to inform you

_________________________________

"That your meeting today has been

moved up from 4:30 p.m. to 3:30 p.m."

_________________________________

What?

_________________________________

"Dear Mr. Thatch, due to your absence,

_________________________________

"the board has voted

to reject your proposal.

_________________________________

"Have a nice weekend.

Mr. Harcourt's office."

_________________________________

They can't do this to me!

_________________________________

I swear, that young Thatch

gets crazier every year.

_________________________________

If I ever hear the word "Atlantis" again,

_________________________________

I'll step in front of a bus.

_________________________________

-(LAUGHS) I'll push you.

-(ALL LAUGHING)

_________________________________

-MILO: Mr. Harcourt!

-Good Lord!

_________________________________

-There he is!

-Members of the board... Wait.

_________________________________

-How did you find us?

-MILO: Mr. Harcourt, wait!

_________________________________

Head for the hills!

_________________________________

Where is a guard when you need him?

_________________________________

Mr. Harcourt, you gotta listen to me, sir!

_________________________________

Uh, sir?

_________________________________

Wait! Mr. Harcourt!

_________________________________

Sir, I have new evidence that...

Please, Mr. Harcourt!

_________________________________

Stop! Sir, if you... Could you hold...

_________________________________

Thank you very much. Look at...

_________________________________

This museum funds

scientific expeditions

_________________________________

based on facts,

not legends and folklore.

_________________________________

Besides, we need you here.

_________________________________

-We depend on you.

-You do?

_________________________________

Yes. What with winter coming,

_________________________________

that boiler's going to need

a lot of attention.

_________________________________

-Boiler?

-Onward, Heinz!

_________________________________

But there... There's a journal!

_________________________________

It's in Iceland! I'm sure of it this time!

_________________________________

(THUDDING)

_________________________________

Sir, I really hoped

it wouldn't come to this,

_________________________________

but this is a letter of resignation.

_________________________________

If you reject my proposal, I'll...

_________________________________

Whoa!

_________________________________

I'll quit!

_________________________________

I mean it, sir.

_________________________________

If you refuse to find my proposal...

_________________________________

You'll what?

_________________________________

Flush your career down the toilet,

_________________________________

just like your grandfather?

_________________________________

You have a lot of potential, Milo.

_________________________________

Don't throw it all away

chasing fairy tales.

_________________________________

But I can prove Atlantis exists!

_________________________________

You want to go on an expedition?

_________________________________

Here. Take a trolley

to the Potomac and jump in!

_________________________________

Maybe the cold water will

clear your head. Heinz!

_________________________________

_________________________________
DALLBEN: There's something wrong.

I can feel it in my bones.
_________________________________

The Fairfolk know it too.
_________________________________

You don't see any of them around.

_________________________________
(MEOWS)
_________________________________

The Horned King,
_________________________________

that black hearted devil,
_________________________________

what's he waiting for?
_________________________________
(MEOWS)

_________________________________

Yes, yes, cat.

I know you want your breakfast,
_________________________________

but just now

thinking is more important.
_________________________________

-(LID RATTLING)
-Oh!
_________________________________

Taran! The pot is boiling over, Taran!
_________________________________

Oh, Dallben. I was just thinking.

_________________________________
What if the war's over,

and I never had a chance to fight?
_________________________________

And a good thing too.
_________________________________

War isn't a game. People get hurt.
_________________________________

But I'm not afraid. Ouch!
_________________________________

Yes, there you are.
_________________________________

If the Horned King ever returns,
_________________________________

you'll have a great deal more
to worry about

_________________________________

than a burned finger.
_________________________________
(EXCLAIMS)
_________________________________

No, no, no, cat. That is not for you.

It's for Hen Wen.
_________________________________

Hen Wen, Hen Wen.
It's always Hen Wen!

_________________________________

And one day, my boy,
you may learn why.

_________________________________

Now, no more dreaming.
You have chores to do.

_________________________________

Yes, sir.
_________________________________

He's so anxious
_________________________________

and so blind to the dangers ahead.

_________________________________

Look! Look, cat. You're in luck.
_________________________________

Just enough left for you.
_________________________________

Dallben doesn't understand.

_________________________________
I'm not a little boy anymore.

_________________________________

I should be doing heroic deeds

for Prydain,
_________________________________
not waiting

hand and foot on a spoiled...
_________________________________

Hey!
_________________________________

Oh, all right, Hen.
_________________________________

I didn't mean it.
_________________________________

You'd better eat it.
_________________________________

Dallben made it especially for you.
_________________________________

Is this to be my life? Pampering a pig?

_________________________________

I'm a warrior, not a pig keeper.
_________________________________

Dallben thinks I'd be afraid,

but I wouldn't.
_________________________________

All I need is a chance,
_________________________________

and I could be a famous warrior.
_________________________________

Look at me, Hen! I can do it!
_________________________________
Hah!
_________________________________

(SQUEALING FEARFULLY)
_________________________________

(LAUGHS) Even you're afraid.

_________________________________

Do you challenge me?
Run, you cowards.

_________________________________
(SQUAWKING)
_________________________________

-There you are.

-(BLEATS)
_________________________________

His Majesty, the Horned King.
_________________________________

So we meet at last.
_________________________________
Hah!
_________________________________

Even the Horned King shakes with fear.

_________________________________

See, Hen? Everybody runs

from the famous Taran of Caer Dallben!
_________________________________
(COUGHS)

_________________________________

Prydain's finest warrior
_________________________________

draws his last breath.
_________________________________

Dallben.
_________________________________

Hmm. Not quite the blade for a hero.
_________________________________

I was... It's just that we were...

_________________________________

Hen Wen got dirty.
_________________________________

Oh, I see.
_________________________________

Another dream, Taran?
_________________________________

But, Dallben, won't I ever be anything

but an assistant pig keeper?
_________________________________

She's a special pig, Taran.
_________________________________

(DALLBEN CHUCKLES)

_________________________________

Now, give her a nice bath.
_________________________________

Well, Hen, it looks as though I'll
still be an assistant pig keeper
_________________________________

when I'm as old as Dallben.
_________________________________

You like that, don't you?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Now for the part
you like best.

_________________________________

Hey, come on, Hen.

I haven't finished scrubbing your...
_________________________________

(SQUEALING IN DISTRESS)
_________________________________

Hen, what's the matter?

Calm down, Hen.
_________________________________

Stop it, please! What's the matter?

_________________________________

Hen Wen...
_________________________________

Taran, what's going on?
_________________________________

I don't know.
_________________________________

There's something wrong with Hen Wen.
_________________________________

What? Quickly, lad. Bring her inside.
_________________________________

What's that for?
_________________________________
Put Hen Wen down.

_________________________________

I never use her powers unless I have to,

_________________________________

but now I must.
_________________________________

Powers?
_________________________________

Taran, what you are about to see,
_________________________________

you must never reveal to anyone.
_________________________________

Hen Wen, from you I do beseech
_________________________________

knowledge that lies beyond my reach,
_________________________________

troubled thoughts beyond your heart.
_________________________________

Pray you now those thoughts impart.
_________________________________

DALLBEN: Ah, the Horned King.
_________________________________

-(GASPS)

-(SHUSHS)
_________________________________
Don't interfere.
_________________________________

He is searching.
_________________________________

The Black Cauldron!
_________________________________

So that's it.
_________________________________

The Black Cauldron?
_________________________________

An awesome weapon, Taran.
_________________________________

It's been hidden for centuries,
_________________________________

but if the Horned King should find it

and unleash its power,
_________________________________

nothing could stand against him.
_________________________________

That's Hen Wen.
_________________________________

He knows.
_________________________________

Stop! Enough!
You must leave here at once.

_________________________________
Take Hen Wen to the hidden cottage
_________________________________

at the edge of the Forbidden Forest.
_________________________________

Hide there and never bring her out

until I come for you.
_________________________________

Hide? But why?
_________________________________

Only I knew the secret
of Hen Wen's power,
_________________________________

but now the Horned King

has discovered it.
_________________________________

We must make sure he never uses

it to find the Black Cauldron.
_________________________________

I'm not afraid of the Horned King.
_________________________________

Then you are a very foolish lad.
_________________________________

Untried courage is no match for his evil.

_________________________________

Just remember that.
_________________________________

Now, off you go, my boy,
_________________________________

and take care of yourself.
_________________________________

Goodbye, Dallben.
_________________________________

I won't fail you.
_________________________________

So much, so soon,
_________________________________

to rest on his young shoulders.

_________________________________

_________________________________

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

_________________________________

(GRUNTS)

_________________________________

(GRUNTS)

_________________________________

(TRILLS)

_________________________________

(TRILLING)

_________________________________

(SIGHS)

_________________________________

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

_________________________________

(GROWLING)

_________________________________

-(RUSTLING)

-(GASPS)

_________________________________

(RUSTLING)

_________________________________

You again?

_________________________________

Get out of here.

_________________________________

-(TRILLS)

-(GASPS)

_________________________________

(GROWLING)

_________________________________

(SNORING)

_________________________________

(GROWLING)

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

_________________________________

(CHOMPING)

_________________________________

Ugh!

_________________________________

(GRUNTING)

_________________________________

_________________________________

(SID SOBBING)
_________________________________

All I wanted is true love.
_________________________________

Is that too much to ask?
_________________________________

(DIEGO GROANS)
_________________________________

Why is it so quiet?
_________________________________

Because the world is mourning my loss.
_________________________________

-(GRUNTS)

-(SCREAMS)
_________________________________

Ellie?
_________________________________

Peaches?
_________________________________

Where is everyone?
_________________________________

ALL: Surprise!
_________________________________

-(ALL LAUGHING)

-(CRAZY IN LOVE PLAYING)
_________________________________

(BLOWING NOISEMAKERS)
_________________________________

Uh... Huh?
_________________________________

BOTH: Ta-da!
_________________________________

Happy Anniversary, honey!
_________________________________

Anniversary?
_________________________________

Oh, no. That's the thing.
_________________________________

-(GIGGLES)

-(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
_________________________________

Okay! Now it's your turn, Bro-Dad!
_________________________________

Yeah! We wanna see what you got Ellie.
_________________________________

Manny!
_________________________________

ALL: Manny! Manny! Manny!
_________________________________

Manny!
_________________________________

Hey, hey. Right.
_________________________________

Uh...
_________________________________

How about another hand for Ellie?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING) Yeah.
_________________________________

Oh.
_________________________________

He forgot!
_________________________________

-(ALL GASP)

-(FAINTS)
_________________________________

FEMALE GUEST: I feel so bad for Ellie.
_________________________________

Ellie, I... Uh...
_________________________________

(FIREWORKS POP)
_________________________________

(ALL EXCLAIMING)
_________________________________

ALL: Ooh! Ah!
_________________________________

He didn't forget.
_________________________________

That's how big Manny's love is for her!
_________________________________

BOTH: Nice save with the light show.
_________________________________

Wait, you didn't do this? Then who did?
_________________________________

Oh, Manny.
_________________________________

I was so afraid you'd forgotten.
_________________________________

But you lit up the sky for me?
_________________________________

How'd you do it?
_________________________________

Uh, well...
_________________________________

A magician never reveals his secrets.
_________________________________

-(CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY)

-Oh...
_________________________________

Thank you.
_________________________________

(CHILDREN LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(SIGHS) I keep picturing

our own kid in there.
_________________________________

He'd be the best one.
_________________________________

-I think you meant "she."

-He.
_________________________________

Either way, we've been over this, Diego.
_________________________________

Kids are afraid of us.
_________________________________

Yeah, but why?
_________________________________

(BOTH LAUGHING)
_________________________________

(BOTH GASP)
_________________________________

Are they gonna eat us?
_________________________________

Hi, kids!
_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAMING)
_________________________________

I even smiled this time.
_________________________________

(GRUNTING)
_________________________________

(LAUGHS)
_________________________________

(MUFFLED GRUNTING)
_________________________________

-(SCREAMS)

-(LAUGHS)
_________________________________
PEACHES: Wow, Dad.

_________________________________

Best present ever.
_________________________________

You, sir, are an education

in martial excellence.
_________________________________

I'm really gonna miss you guys

when we leave.
_________________________________

(GASPS AND COUGHS)
_________________________________

Ow!
_________________________________

Um, actually, I haven't told them yet.
_________________________________

Oh.
_________________________________

Surprise!
_________________________________

You're leaving?
_________________________________

I thought you guys were gonna
live with us the first couple of years.

_________________________________

I know. But Julian and I
_________________________________

kind of want to roam for a while.
_________________________________

-Roam?

-JULIAN: Yeah!
_________________________________

Travel, explore, just go wherever.
_________________________________

No plan is the best plan.

That's my philosophy.
_________________________________

Horse d'oeuvres?
_________________________________

That's not a plan, or a philosophy...
_________________________________

or very safe.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLES) Dad, we're young.
_________________________________

We can worry about being safe

when we're old and boring.
_________________________________

Like you and Mom.
_________________________________

-I think we should just...

-Excuse me!
_________________________________

This is a family discussion.
_________________________________

But aren't I part of your family?
_________________________________

Not yet, you're not.
_________________________________

(SLURPS)
_________________________________

Uh...
_________________________________

Does that look like a problem to you?
_________________________________

A ball of fire heading
directly towards us?

_________________________________

Why would that be a problem?
_________________________________

What if you fall in a ditch
and get amnesia?

_________________________________

What then, huh?
_________________________________

Manny, we have a problem.
_________________________________

Not now. I have a problem.
_________________________________

This one's a little bigger.
_________________________________

-I don't think so.

-Manny!
_________________________________

What?
_________________________________

(GASPS)
_________________________________

-(YELPS)

-Manny?
_________________________________

Uh, okay. Party's over, everybody.
_________________________________

Have a good night. And leave right now!
_________________________________

What are you talking about?

The party just got started.
_________________________________

Yeah.
_________________________________

(YAWNS) Just getting kind of sleepy.
_________________________________

Everyone should go.

And duck. Possibly cover!
_________________________________

Hey, what's gotten into you?
_________________________________

(GASPS)
_________________________________

-Look! There's more coming!

-(ALL GASPING)
_________________________________

Meteor shower!
_________________________________

(GASPS) Meteor?
_________________________________

(SNIFFS) Shower?
_________________________________

(GASPS) Manny's love is killing us!
_________________________________

I suppose this is all part

of your magic show for me?
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY)

Abracadabra?
_________________________________

Can you guys deal with this later?
_________________________________

Come on. We need to take cover.
_________________________________

(PANICKED SCREAMING)
_________________________________

Whoo-hoo! I'm on fire!
_________________________________

Whoo-hoo-hoo! Me too!

We're smoking hot, baby!
_________________________________

(BOTH SCREAMING)
_________________________________
ELLIE: Incoming!

_________________________________

Those are ours!
_________________________________

Are you okay?

How many tusks do you see?
_________________________________

-Tree.

-Three?
_________________________________

No! Tree!
_________________________________

(MANNY GASPS)
_________________________________

(ALL YELP)
_________________________________

Everybody, jump!
_________________________________

(ALL GRUNT)
_________________________________

(ALL PANTING)
_________________________________

Whee!
_________________________________
MANNY: The cave! Get inside!

_________________________________

Move! Move!
_________________________________

-Whoa!

-Whoa!
_________________________________

(GRUNTS)
_________________________________

(WHIMPERING)
_________________________________

(BOTH GASP)
_________________________________

-MANNY: Oh!

-(PEACHES GASPS)
_________________________________

It's okay, sweetheart. Daddy's...
_________________________________

(BREATHING HEAVILY)
_________________________________

-(CRASHING)

-(ALL GRUNT)
_________________________________

Hey, it sounds like it's slowing down.
_________________________________

Yup, it's definitely over.
_________________________________

(CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY)

Except for that one.
_________________________________
MANNY: We might wanna think about
moving underground for a while.
_________________________________

_________________________________